hey, ok so ive always had a best friend & always turned to her for help & everything but then when other people are withh us it feels like im the "odd one outt" or the "3rd wheel" anyway i try to have a good time but sometimes its hardd when you feel left out -thanks for the help!
ana:
well i mean if you can trust her and you know she will always be there for you, dont let yourself become the third wheel you know. i know its alot easier said then done, but right now thats just about all you can do is try to have fun, pput yourself out there and try talking to the other people yall are hanging out with :]
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im 15 and a girl.
i have this friend and she is really a cool person. but she cusses non stop and then when church time comes around she acts all good like she has never done anything bad. what do i do? do i confront her?
ana:
okay well im not really into the church scene, but honestly okay..i cuss SOMETIMES. but i wouldnt do t at church. she is doing what any other normal teenage girl would do. i mean...there isnt much you can really do.
good luck:]
mikela.
why do you care,,,
i mean just cause you cuss doesnt make you a bad person or a bad christian. its just words. i mean like of course you wouldnt cuss in the house of god. jeez get over it. worry about your self and not your friends vocabulary
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(13/f)
Ok..well, i recently started going to church with my aunt and uncle(they live in a town next to mine) and the main reason i keep going to their church is because i think all of the kids at the youthgroup are really cool, most of them are older then me(its a really,really small church) and i recently found out that the reason that all the other kids are so close..and such good friends..is because theyve been through soo much together..one kids mom died of cancer a few years ago..one guys dad and stepmom like killed his brother in a fire..and he started running away, and now is in custody of his stepdad(hes so much better now,u would never guess he went thru all of that)...(the pastors wife told me all this stuff, so they dont know that i know about it)
-- basically i really want to be good friends with all of them..and show them im here for them if they ever do have problems..but they are so close..they probly dont want anyone trying to get into there tight-nit group of friends..so should i keep trying? and hope they want to be close friends with me too, or just back off..cuz its not like they ignore me, i mean ive hung out with them and stuff..but i kind of feel like an outsider still.........help?
mikela.
aw. well. if you pick one. and make best friends with him the rest might see your not so bad and will let you in. i mean dont push it. just hang out with the one you like the most. but believe it or not being friends with just that one person could be good. i mean like not all of them will excatally be thrilled to add another aditiion. but you also need to make sure to prove to them your trust worthy and deserve to be in there little click. :]
PS. ana is at camp.
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Well, whenever me and my two best friends hang out it's all good and we're all happy and talkative with eachother. But lately, this one girl has started to come in and talk to us and whenever she does, I tend to get the left-out feeling. I'll talk but my two other friends'll be like,"Wait, what did you say?" and they sort of pay more attention to her and walk with her more. So basically, I get the boot. But like I said, whenever she's NOT there we're all completely fine and everything.
I just don't know how to handle her whenever she's there.
It's getting to the point that whenever they want her to hang out with all of us I have to make up a lie of some sort so she wouldn't be able to come along.
Help?
mikela thinks.
well. there are two ways to aproch this.
1. you can tell your friends maybe its just me but i feel kinda left out when that girls around.. i mean if theyre really your friends they will understand, i mean mind would.
2. when she come you can try being cool with her. like try talkign to her. try to like get more into the convo with her. does this make since. like if shes says, isnt that the cutest cat. be like omg it is i have a cat like that..da da da da da continue on. if you cant beat it..join it.
that or you can just not hang with your friends when theyre with that person. but that will kinda cut you out on alot of gatherings. the best thing todo is tell your friends how you feel,
ana think:
well.next time your hangin out with just you and your two friends let them know that its bugging you and you feel like they are totally leaving you out. let them know you arent trying to breakup there friendship with this other girl, but it really makes you feel bad when yall all 4 hangout because you feel so left out of everything. dont be whiney about it. just be mature about how you bring it up and how you tell them. they seem like really great friends and im sure they will understand
good luck=] IM me if you need anything else.
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ever since my friend got a boyfriend,she has been bailing on me. I feel as if i am being left out. She says we are still friends, but i just dont know. What do i do?
ana: well we all know when a girl gets a new boyfriend, thats just about all she can think about, i know you feel like your being left out right now but just hold it out, she'll come around she is just excited about her man. dont try to budd in on them. just tell her straight upp that even though the relationship with her man is important so is yalls friendship. she needs to be alerted before she bails so much that she starts to loose her friends, she'll appreciate you saying somthing.=]
mikela thinks:
listen. you gotta set your friend straight REAL fast. just be like listen i love you. your my best friend but you cant keep bailing on me. like i know your boyfriend is important but so is our friendship. set out a day like a..NO MATTER WHAT WERE HANGING OUT THIS DAY. like every monday its you and her time. that way youll see her and its a cool way ya know. but try to be her friend and tell her what shes doing cause she needs to be aware
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dear mikela&ana,
i got in a fight with two of my really good friends a while ago. And whenever we get into fights, I'm always the person who has to fix things, and talk about it. What if they don't try to make things better? I'm scared that our friendship will go to waste. I miss them, but for some reason, i feel like i can't let them know that. For some reason, i feel like i HAVE to act like i don't care, when i REALLY REALLY do. I don't know, a part of me says "WHO CARESS?!" then the other part of me is like "well, you've all had some GREAT times, and you still care about them dearly, and it would be nice to still have 2 friends, instead of losing them." oy, idk. WHAT SHOULD I DO?!?!?!
ana thinks: well. if you care this much they are obviously really important friends to you. some time when yall are together, sit them down and let them know that yalls friendship wont work if they dont pitch in, hopefully this will open up a whole new door to yalls friendship and they will express there opinions about the topic as well. dont tell yourself "who cares". because if you guys never work things out you will regret it to the maxiumm. dont let 2 good friends slip away, work it out (unless they arent contributing to the friendship).
if anything happens let me know. good luck!
mikela:
if your friend isnt trying to fix things. what kind of friend is that. i mean a real freind wants to work things out am i right. but if this is a fight over something stupid like OMG I WANTED THAT HAT! AND YOU WENT AND BOUGHT IT. then well you both will get over it. dont waste your friendship over something stupid. but if its something like real then deff dotn apoligiez i mean listen to their side of course its only fair. but dont be like dude we need to make up let them come to you. either way dont waste your friendship unless its something good. but try to be a bigger person.
LOTSOFLUV. peace
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okay. so this BITCH is all over my BOYFRIEND and i do believe the words BITCH and BOYFRIEND dont go together but shes kind of like my friend...ish. and if i tell her that she needs to back the hell off of him (which she needs to, believe me)then all of her n her friends n my boyfriend will probly think im retarded. but she acts like he's her boyfriend so i WANNA say sumthing but...AHHHHH idunno what to say to her w/o being the loser/ jealous/ girlfriend that i am
anaA thinkss:okay, i totally get where you are coming from. but she knows yall are boyfriend and girlfriend, and she is just trying to compete with you and obviously its not working because yall are still together. i would let her know though, dont be whiney about it, just get straight to the point and let her know how much its upsetting you but no need to start beef. just talk to her privatley and tell her that you dont want to make this a huge deal, but you just wanna clear the air and make sure she knows that her flirtting && trying to get with your man when he is yours really bothers you. dont be a biotch about it, just let her know calmly. im sure she will understand, if not maybe yalls friendship isnt one worth pursuing.
mikela thinks..listen. if this girl is all over your man. you really need to tell her. but be mature and calm and relaxed. just be like listenn i like you your cool da da da da but im not comfertable with you spending more time with my boyfriend than i do. so if you could please lay off him, because if this continues im going to be forced to take dramatic and imediate action! :] thanks bitch!
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