I am a 20 year old guy in college. I have fun helping people with any of their problems. I fell in love with this site when everybody was so nice to me and helped me fix a problem with a girl awhile back, so I'm back to repay the favor. Many times when we have problems we dont think of the most sensible answer. So if you are looking for a little insight and some help, I'm your guy!
Gender: Male
Location: MN
Occupation: Student
Age: 20
Member Since: November 21, 2004
Answers: 135
Last Update: November 9, 2011
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Missa8305
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17/F I know I should be happy for my best friend who finally got a boyfriend..like today for the first time EVER..but I'm not. I've never had one either..and I've just feeling very very upset with her that now I have to make room for her boyfriend..and I hate sharing. I know, I sound crazy, jealous and everytime I talk to her, I get really mad because all she does is talk about him now. Seriously, what can I do to stop feeling this way because I don't want to keep feeling like a REALLY bad friend..I'm the only single one now..and it sucks being single all by yourself. Help? (link)
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This exact same thing happened to me when my roommate and best friend got a girlfriend this year. At first, he did nothing but spend time with her and I got really jealous. But because of this, I ended up hanging out with her a lot too. And now we are actually good friends while she is still my roommates girlfriend. I dont know, it took maybe about a month for my jealousy to get over (I guess it's not completely over cuz its annoying when I want to hang out with him but he has to be with his GF). Anyway, my suggestion is just to hang out with both of them. You will still be hanging out with your best friend but you might make another friend in the process.
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Okay well me & this guy are best friends and we really love each other a lot {but just as friends not bf gf}. and he told me today that i make him feel like shit. So 2nite on the fone he said its the way i always turn everything good in his life negative, and i think im just telling the truth. We both know that i don't have the will to try for anything, I have never had the will to try, so he won't believe me when I said I'm gonna rly try not to be so negative. Also tonight on the phone i asked him if I was a horrible person for doing this to him and he said I'm not gonna lie and didnt answer... and when he finally did answer he said im rly tired and I need to go to bed. So i dont kno if he was jus ttoo tired or if im a horrible person! Please please help me!!! he's my wprld and idk how to get him to trust that i'll try!!! help this heartache is killing me!!! (link)
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I dont think you are a horrible person, he went a bit overboard about that. But it is obviously bothering him. I'm not really sure what exactly you are saying to him to make him feel like this, but I'll give you an example. If he says something like he is going away for the summer. Although it would be crappy for you, make it sound like you are excited and happy for him. That's just a vague example. Try to think of him more. That's not horrible, its actually human nature. But it does get annoying. Sometimes people need to give white lies to make people feel better or whatever. You say that you think you are just telling the truth, but sometimes the truth hurts, and you might have to pick your battles. Sorry to be kind of blunt, but i hope i gave you a couple ideas on how to help.
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13/Female
A couple years ago I had this BFF and we did everything together, we were really close. I dont know what happened but we arent frinds anymore, now she has this ONE best friend that is moving away. I feel really bad for her and I cant help it but I feel like I want to be her friend again so I can be there for her. Is that the right thing to do or would I just be starting a whole other mess of a frindship?
Thanks
-Hal (link)
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If you guys just kind of drifted apart for really no apparent reason, I would go ahead and let her know that you feel bad about her friend moving away. But if you got in a fight and that is the reason you are not friends anymore, I might not say anything. It kind of depends on the situation of why you guys dont hang out anymore. Odds are it would make her feel better if you told her you were there for her, and you felt bad.
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Today I was hangin' out at Taco Bell w/ a bunch of my friends, who were all guys. They claimed that men were better than women at pretty much everything. Then when I disagreed, they said to me, "Ok, name one thing that women are better at than men." I was stuck. Then they started laughing 'cause I didn't say anything. They were like, "Yeah, all these great geniuses and inventors, like Einstein and all, all men." It made me so mad, and embarassed. They said they were just messin' with me, but I somehow can't believe that. I feel like they meant what they were saying. Should I confront them again? Or should I just let it slide and hope it doesn't come up again(maybe they were just kidding after all). (link)
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I'm a guy, and I'm ashamed of the guy community that we say this. Our society hasn't been as accepting to women until recently. Women have only been allowed to vote since like 1920. I think if our society was always equaly, you would have seen a woman president already. But you guys are still fighting to be seen as equals (look at the WNBA). This is my poor attempt to explain why they said that, but here's what you do. Dont bring it up again, but if it does, turn the tables on them. Say "why are all the bad people in the world men?" Like osama bin laden, hussein, benedict arnold, ken lay, there's a million of them. But i bet you can hardly name 2 bad women in the world.
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