aliapple's advice column | aliapple's Advice About Friendship

askaliapple

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Is god real im confused

My brilliant answer:
Everyone has a different opinion on this topic. You have to figure it out on your own. A lot of people think that God created the earth with help from science, others belive it was only God and even more belive it was purely science. Truthfully, no one can decide for you and you have to decide whether or not you belive in God or not. You can research by using google, religous sites, the bible and other books. Hope I helped!

Q: Theres this guy that i really really like, but i can hardly talk to him in person... what should i do? i've tryed saying hi to him in the hallways and stuff but that hasnt ever started a big conversation. i ran into him one time @ grand central (we live in new york)and he looked right at me and waved. i think thats the most interaction we've ever had though. i know he has msn messenger, and so do i, should i try to get his screen name? or are there better things i can do?

My brilliant answer:
Well, 1st off, your friend was wrong/lied. 2nd of all about this guy...i'm in a similar secumstance and i know it sucks. You should continue saying "hi" in the hallway, because even if it doesn't spark a big conversation, it lets him know you are closer than just someone he knows and that's a start. i think getting his sn is a great idea, becuase a lot of times you will feel less nervous when talking, but be sure to make all big things in person, because internet isn't always the most personal or private or safe. If you have classes with him, you can start to make comments like "nice" or "cool" or just smile at him when he gets something right. things will happen in know time. hope i helped and the best of luck!

Q: I've been friends with a married man for about 3 years and we have never crossed the line. I knew him and his wife before they moved last year. I thought of him as one of my closest friends- he was someone I could always talk to. Well yesterday we got into a big fight on MSN messenger. I told him that I missed him (because I harldy get to see him since he moved) and then he made a comment "I'm a married man". Then I said "I know- just friends". I was upset and told him I didnt think we should talk anymore. He wanted to know why. I told him that his comment " I'm a married man" made it sound like I wanted an affair with him. I assured him I was not like that. I said I would never cheat with a married man because it happend with my mom and dad. I also said I hoped we could still be friends. Well I thought he would have respected me for saying that but instead he coldly responded with "good bye". He gave me no explanation either. I thought this man was my friend- surely a true friend would understand. Now he has completely shut me out. He won't answer my phone calls and I sent two emails saying that he was the best friend I ever had and I hoped we could still be friends. He is not responding. This man has been an important friend in my life for the last 3 years- this just doesnt make sense. Why do think he's being this way? Do you think he really did want an affair with me and now is miffed that he knows he won't be getting any?

My brilliant answer:
Something similar happened to me. When a friend moves away (esspecially a close friend) both friends tend to want to shut their close friend out and so they over react at everything. They are doing this without knowing so. It sounds to me like you should not call or e-mail or in anyway contact him for about a week or two and then tell him your sorry and that you overeacted that you were wrong. You may not agree with what you are telling him, but a little white lie is worth what seems like a great friendship. Hope I helped!