Why am I here? Because I want to help you. No matter the question, I will do my best to give you the best advice I have to offer.
Gender: Female
Location: Canada
Occupation: Student
Age: 17
Member Since: January 1, 2012
Answers: 123
Last Update: May 11, 2015
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In response to the question about visiting my mother in jail
How do you think this could change her parenting to me? Would it be eye opening for her to be in the punishment situation now? Maybe she'll go easier on me (link)
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I mean it's possible yes but then again she may be harder on you because she doesn't want you to end up in jail too
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my mother is going to jail for eight months for a financial crime. My dad asked if I want to visit her sometime because he said she would appreciate a visit and it could be an "educational experience" (What does that mean?)
I have no problem with my mother and other than this misdeed she was a good mother but I don't know if I should subject myself to go into a jail just to see her for a while. Does anyone know what it is like there and how the visiting works? I am a 14 year old girl by the way. Also, what can we talk about in the short time we probably have?
My best friend joked ""maybe it will remind your mom how it feels when she punishes you. when she comes back, things might be a little different". Even though she is joking she has a point. Kind of funny to think she is in the punishment situation now
also, my dad said I still have to listen to my mother when she gets out and even when she is jail if she calls and he wants her opinion on something he will listen. I don't understand how he can do this. I mean like I said I don't hate my mom or anything and had a good relationship with her but now that she committed a crime, her telling what to do would be hypocritical (link)
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From 14 year old I wouldn't expect a different reaction, but your mom didn't do anything TOO bad if she's only in there for 8 months. The visiting process is usually just both of you sitting at a table I'm pretty sure. It pobably won't be that weird at first considering she hasn't been in there forever but later visits might be a bit more tense. Yiu could talk about school, how jail is etc. And personally I still think she has a say in final decisions. She is still your mother and when she ets out she will still be taking care of you. Her crime was a financial one so no she will not be hypocritical.
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I will try to make this short
I am getting married in a few months. My parents are divirced and my father has never really tried to initiate contact with me. Now that I have been planning a wedding, I seem to be resenting my father for loss of time abd not trying. I asked my mother to walk me, my step father is a JOP who will take the honors of marrying us. My father will be at this wedding...I have stopped talking to him from 2008-2012 due to the fact that I got tired of being the only one tryibg to have a relationship with my dad. I am getting tired again, He still doesn't call or visit me. It is his birthday on July 3rd and I was invited by stepmother to have dinner. I don't even wabt to go nor do I want to buy him anything. Instead I am feeling the want to just forget it and be happy with people who try to be in my life. I almost feel as I am a burden and unwanted. If it weren't for me visiting him (30 min drive) there wouldn't even be any relationship at all. I love my dad but I seem to not wabt to waste energy any more (link)
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It's not quite clear what you're asking. It seems like you want someone to vent to which is totally okay. You may love your father but you don't have to like him. I mean, with what you said it's obvious you're done trying and it seems as though he was a long time ago. I don't think you can do anything but live your life. Just don't talk to him if you don't have to, if you have to see him you'll have grin and bear it. I don't know what else to say, sorry.
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13f
sorry this might be a little long
i have 2 guy cousins that are both 11. they always say really mean about me and normally i try to ignore it, but earlier we were at their grandma's (my great aunt) 80th birthday party. it was a big deal for everybody, so i thought they would leave me alone for her special night. we were taking pictures as a family, and they wouldn't stop saying really mean stuff to me. it was really embarrassing because my older cousins were also around too. i kept asking them to be nice because it was a really important night for their grandma. they were just like "we have to be nice to grandma but not you". i lost my temper and hit one of them and my aunt saw. everybody started yelling at me. i know what i did was wrong and i shouldn't have hit him, but no one said anything to my cousins to stop. later, one of my great aunts told me the same thing that i told them! and then my mom yelled at me. i understand what i did was wrong and i apologized for it but they didn't even get in trouble. and it didn't stop either. it got worse the whole night and they kept embarrassing me in front of everybody. they always do this to me and they even turned my brother against me too. and when their parents actually hear the stuff they say to me, they try to discipline them but all it serves to do is get them to hate me even more. i'm trying really hard to be christian like about the whole thing. i've even tried talking to people about it and avoiding them. but in cases like the one earlier, its really hard to stand there and let them talk so badly about me. what are some things i could do about them when i have to be around them? any answers (preferably something a good christian would do) are appreciated :) (link)
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I find it great that you did end up to hit your cousin, as that is what I probably would have done too. It is a boy thing. They don't mature as fast as us girls can, and can be really stupid. My advice would be to try and talk to your parents as many times as you can. Tell them how they are bothering you, and hopefully they will listen. But don't make the mistake of hitting them again. If it comes down to it, play em (CAUSTIOUSLY) at their own game. If they insult you, do it back. If that lands you in too much trouble, you can always video tape their mean behaviour towards you. Best of luck!
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