There is a certain aura of peace when you help somebody in need. I am here to give anybody advice who asks or is in need of it, located in NYC.
Gender: Female
Location: New York, New York.
Occupation: Writer
Age: 23
MSN: kenzie201085@gmail.com
Member Since: February 27, 2015
Answers: 13
Last Update: October 22, 2015
Visitors: 2677
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I have been diagnosed with Major depression with psychotic features (I see, hear and feel things that others can't). My friends say that it is all in my head and that I'm just making an excuse as to why I choose to be depressed and I can prevent it. Is this true? Am I making of all of this up? If I am, what are some things I can try in order to not choose to be depressed? If I'm not making this up and my friends just don't like it, then what can I do to help myself not be so depressed so I can get through the day?
Here's the situation:
I am no longer interested in hobbies that I used to like (example: video games, drawing, reading, writing, phototraphy). I also am crying off and on throughout the day. I can barely eat or sleep. If I do get to sleep, I have trouble staying asleep. I see shadow people and they constantly talk and touch me keeping me up all night to where I can't sleep. I basically get out of bed to go to work and when I get home, I just sit and do nothing.
My husband is understanding of my situation and is also trying to help me find a coping skill to master so my depression cannot control me any more.
My real Question is: What are some good coping skills do deal with my mental disorder? (link)
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Firs thing, your friends are absolutely incorrect! In no way do I mean this to be offensive, but if your friends are telling you that you are making your depression (psychotic or not) up- then they are not a great bunch of friends.
As somebody who has suffered tremendously through depression, psych hospitals and all- I know it can be extremely difficult to deal with depression and it can be even harder to indulge in the depth of your depression with people, no matter how close to you they are. Being depressed is in no way a choice. It is however, a choice to get help and live with your depression, but nothing is going to ever make you "un-depressed".
There are medications you can take to manage your depression, but this usually entails seeing specialized psychologists, which can be hard to come by. Also they can be very, very expensive. The best way in my opinion, that I have learned works far better than any medication that can be prescribed- is surrounding yourself with positive influence.
This probably sounds nearly impossible, after all when you are depressed you start to become irritable and the things you used to love you lose interest in. Find your niche, that thing that gets you through the day. Take every day just ten seconds at a time, tell yourself you can push through it. It is also extremely important for you to take care of yourself! No matter how many people tell you that you are crazy, or call you a liar- only you know how you are feeling.
At the end of the day, if the best decision you can make for yourself is to cut people out of your life, you should do it. Your husband being understanding of the situation is a great thing, but there will most likely be days where your husband lashes out at you for being the way you are. This does not mean he hates you, or he is mad at you per-say- he will most likely do this because he doesn't understand it on a personal level.
Seeing something and understanding the text-book behind it, does mean somebody understands the reality of it. Some things I do when I get depressed are-
1.) Talk to somebody (as cliche as it sounds, I find it helps!) But it has to be somebody who will listen
2.) Go for a walk
3.) Write down my feelings (No, this is not just something children do! It really helps!)
4.) Take a hot bath, light some candles, and open your mind to all of your problems and come up with a logical and safe solution for them.
5.) Anything distracting. Shopping, watching a movie, baking, etc.
I hope that these all helped, and never feel ashamed for the way you are feeling. For any more questions/advice feel free to visit my column and ask any questions you may have.
~Kenzieanonymous
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Hi Everybody,
So I am 19 years old and recently my mother and younger brother moved away, and I moved into my fathers house. As well as my boyfriend of 3 years even more recently moved away. I now live with my older brother, younger sister, step mom and father. I cannot be upstairs for long periods of time because I have some issues with my sister and I get very mad and irritated with her because she does not know what an inside voice is. Anyways, my mother and I are very close, and she is truly my bestfriend. And ever since everyone moved away I feel very lonely. I have never had many friends, so I basically sit in my room and do homework, and go to work, and go to college. I get very anxious not having anyone to talk too, and I have a strong desire to get a dog. I feel as though a dog could lift my spirits and save me from becoming depressed. The problem is, my step mom and sister have 4 cats 1 small dog and 1 guinea pig. I was close with my mother dog but she obviously moved away with my mother, and I just want to feel wanted. I know that having a pet that I could love and would love me back, and keep me company would fix my problem, but how on earth am I supposed to convince them? They know I want a dog, but they don't realize that I need a dog. (link)
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Want and need are very, very, different things; however they disguise themselves so similarly that it's hard for people to tell the difference. Especially people that aren't the ones with the desire for what they want, or in your case need.
I am not familiar with your family so it would be hard for me to give you any solid advice on how you can convince them to let you get a dog. Chances are if you use stress from college life as a reason, they will backfire by saying something along the lines of, "If you are stressed with college, being responsible for a dog will be even harder." If this is the case, tell them about library dogs.
They have been proven to encourage a confident consumption of books, and dogs are proven to be an attractive companion whilst reading or studying- helping students of all ages. This method of dog therapy is quite weird to many, but proven to work. Thus- a dog would actually help you with your studying and college work.
Dogs are capable of understanding up to 250 words and gestures, as well as emotions. While this may be a weird and seemingly pointless thing to say to your parents in order to convince them to get you a dog, it will prove that dogs are capable of understanding people on an emotional level, thus helping you emotionally with issues that you can't talk to your parents about.(the average dog is as intelligent as a two year old child, and can count up to five).
Now, these next things I am going to list don't have anything to do with dogs- but are successful tips on how to get what you want.
1.) Repeat something back to people, for example if somebody said "I like dogs but," you say back to them, "You like dogs?" This shows assertiveness and makes people feel obligated to do what the other person wants.
2.) Ask for more than you really want. For example, say you really want a small yorkie- ask for a golden retriever. When they say no, then ask for a yorkie. Because they said no the first time and the second thing you asked for was less than the original thing you asked, they often feel bad and say yes.
3.) Mirror body language, this subconsciously makes the person think they agree with what you are saying.
4.) Ask for a small favor before you ask for what you really want, since they said yes the first time they will automatically (in most cases) agree, because it makes them feel superior and as though you are reliant of them.
5.) Have other's around you agree with what you are saying, the person who does not agree often then agree's simply because everybody else is agreeing, and they think it must be right.
All of those have been proven scientifically to work in 70% of situations.
For any more advice make sure to favorite my column and I will be sure to answer you in any ways possible. I hope that it all works out for you and you get your dog in the end!
~Kenzieanonymous
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Hi my parents finally found out that I want to be tested for being bipolar. It runs in my family and my emotions have been like a roller coaster since I was little. I'm kind of happy that I can get help, but Im scared. Like scared to the point were I would say I'm not going and wouldn't cooperate. And the thing is I don't know why! I've wanted help for so long but now that I can get it I'm terrified. I guess I'm afraid the medicine is going to change who I am and I've done some reasearch and the side effects are kinda bothersome to me. I dont know. Has any one ever been screened before for it and is now on the medication? (link)
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I am sorry to inform you that I have no personal experience with bipolar disorder, but that does not mean that I don't understand or relate with you.
Many disorders have run in my family and are hereditary, some of which I even suffer from. Anxiety, depression, insamnia, suicidal thoughts. All of which I have taken medication for, I fully understand the conflict you are feeling.
Medication and deciding to go onto medication can be a very scary decision. Especially when the decision is not up to you. It is an excellent start by telling your parents you want to be tested for bipolar disorder (assuming they were told).
The idea of getting help and the actual point where you go and get help are completely different things. For the longest time I wanted to tell my parents about my suicidal thoughts, and hurtful nature. When the time came for me to actually proceed in the process of getting help it seemed like every thought I had of wanting to get help disappeared into the oblivion.
Medicine can change who you are if not the proper medicine for you, no psychiatrist will prescribe you medication they believe won't be good for you. It's a scary thing trying new medication but the good part about it is, if you don't like the effect that it has on you it is completely your decision to end that medication and try a new one.
If you don't like the side effects of a medication, don't take it. Taking a medication you are afraid of taking can scare you into having a bad reaction, simply because you think you will.
It is very brave of you to take the initiative to get help. I commend you immensely for that, be sure to favorite my column if you ever want to ask me and more questions. I would be happy to answer them.
~kenzieanonymous
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