Hi I'm Alyssa. I'm from Las Vegas, NV but now I'm living in Anaheim, California as a Disney Princess... Princess Jasmine specifically. Really into guitar, singing, and I'm also a lifeguard. I love poetry as well.
Gender: Female
Location: Las Vegas
Occupation: Disney Princess
Member Since: June 16, 2010
Answers: 12
Last Update: June 21, 2010
Visitors: 2538
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I've been dating someone for a couple of years and i know he loves me and i love him and all of that great stuff. We have a happy and mature relationship and i can definitely see a future between us. There is just one thing that i cant fully get out of my mind though... around 2 years before we met, his ex-girlfriend moved away, cheated on him and broke up with him. she basically broke his heart. they had dated in high school for a couple years before this. i know this obviously because we talked about our exes when we started seeing each other, just because i think its good to know someones dating history. he says he was depressed about it for a really long time...ive asked him about her before and he says hes over it, and he really hasnt said anything to make me think otherwise. what bothers me is that if i ever bring her up (which isnt often...i do it very casually...) he just says how much of a bitch she is and he doesnt know or care if shes doing okay or even alive (a bit dramatic?)
so yeah. usually they say that being bitter is a bad sign... if you're truly over someone you should have closure and forgiveness is your mind. but she DID cheat on him. so maybe he has a right to feel that way. i don't know. please help. (link)
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I don't think you should worry about it. If he gets upset about her, then there is a possibility that he isn't over it quite yet. Just a possibility. If he says he's over it, you should believe him. He deserves your trust.
And even if he's not completely over it, he's with you now, and he cares about you very much. Personally, I think it takes years to completely get over someone, so you have nothing to worry about. Bitterness is just part of the healing process. If he were to tell you that he still thinks about her and yadda yadda, then you should worry.
Part of it could be him just getting annoyed that you would think that he could think of anyone else but you.
I don't know him, so I don't know.
He has a right to not care about her. She cheated, and that hurts every guys ego.
I wish you two the best.
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he was my first real love, and broke up with be abruptly when i was 12. now i'm 16, and i thought for sure i was over it, but now i'm not so certain. i started going out with his best friend a while back, and they were both fine with my ex's and my own history together, so there wasn't a problem there. i don't see him very often, but when i know he's coming to my boyfriend's house or i know i'm going to see him, i get anxious. my stomach starts hurting with anxiety and i get really paranoid about the way i look or act. does this mean i still like him, or am i just weird. (link)
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You're not weird. Whenever I see any of my exes, I do that too.
I think you should think about it like this. (My friend gave me this exact advice.)
"He was your first love. Of course you are going to miss him a little and think that the relationship was amazing. But you guys have both changed since age 12. You two might not even have the same things in common. Your first love will always be your first love, but you gotta move on from that."
Think about your boyfriend. Think about how amazing he is and how much you two have both grown up. :)
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i'm a girl, 16 years old going on 17, and i have been dateing my boyfriend sense March 27, 2010. The problem with dateing him is there's a age gap... we are 5 years apart, or 4 depends on how you look @ it, which means he's 21.
so in the first month of our dateing everything was cool and all we would do is hang out. in the 2nd month, or the middle of the 2nd month there was a prblem, he wanted to have sex. see i know that if we do have sex it would be counted as rape, and he would go to jail and i would be in trouble, BIG TROUBLE. so i told him we should wait. so during may he tells me he wants to change his life and start going to church with me.
one day after church i went with him to go meet his mom, we met and she is a wonderful lady. Then the week after he jumped back on the subject (which he's been jumping on alot even after i said no the 1st time) and he gives me the same lame excuses, "well, if your mine, why can't i have all of you?" or "baby, i love you, and i just wanna show you how much i do" and ect. And every time he gives me those lame excuses, as if i never heard those lines b4, i tell him the same thing "you can wait, and if you can't leve."
now he's never did anything to make me wanna leve him, except bring up the sex subject like 1,000 times and i'm getting tired of it. i've asked some of my friend and some said they would "have sex with him and leve him." some said "jus stop talking to him, he'll get the clue." and others said "screw him like bunnys do, and make the sex so good he wouldn't dare leve."
but i'm not worried about him leveing. if he does, he does. that's how i feel. i just don't know what to do. i realy do like him and we have fun together but i'm tired of telling him no and always talking about it.
what do i do? should i give IT up, or give HIM up?
please, some one give me some advice. (link)
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I think you know the answer to this.
Tell him what you just told us, and that you don't want him to get in trouble.
Is the only reason you're not having sex with him because of his age? If so, you might want to re-evaluate the situation and do what you both want.
I'm really curious as to whether or not YOU want sex. Because you are just as important as he is. If you're not ready for it, you're not ready for it.
I think you need to tell him that you care about him, but you're not ready. And if he asks you all the time, it's going to ruin the moment when it happens. Explain it's getting annoying.
And like you said, if he leaves, he leaves.
But if he doesn't and he waits for you to be ready, then he's a keeper.
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Okay so this is basically goin to be the story of my life, haha.
Jk, the story of my past last four years, i have always been a social butterfly and that's how i met my boyfriend he was not so good looking and i always thought i was pretty good looking i had never gone out with a guy i didnt physically find attractive but my friends begged me they said he was really nice.when we got in the relationship he would always check out other girls n point out how much hotter they were so i became extremely jealous i would not let him talk to girls or have a myspace or facebook or go in out or anything he would always do it behind my back anyway go out and stuff and i would cry everyday because of stuff he would say or do so he stopped checking out girls but he did everything behind my back and then we lived like that for four years i stopped talking to all my friends because i was always with him and i thought he did too and then recently i found a bunch of porn on his computer i broke up with him and was devastated because he always told me he would never look at the other girls cause i was the hottest and prettiest, he was my first and i was his first. then i wanted to change so i started to change when i kinda got over the porn thing because he said it was his first time.then i got on his tmobile account and saw he would talk to alot of numbers so i asked him about it and he admitted some were girls and he would talk to them a lot more than me then shortly after he told me he had a facebook and he met them all on facebook they were his old friends and then i broke up with him a week before my graduation and i have no friends now and i feel so lonely.he was the only person always there for me. idk if i should get back with him after a while but he told me he did flirt with girls and when i call him now that we are not together he yells and gets mad he doesnt want to talk to me but he says he still likes me and i just dont know how to move on i just graduated from high school and the night i broke up with him i fell down some stairs and broke my ankle so i quit my job because all these things were happening so i thought i needed some time but now i feel miserable alone and find myself calling him all the time idk if i should get back with him i doubt he ever cheated but he talked to a couple of girls all day and he works nights and he would stay up when he got home from work talking to them(sometimes not even sleep) and he would tell me he was asleep or while at work he would not call me during his breaks because he lied and said his phone was dying, but in his tmobile i found out he was talking to them a lot. :( WAS IT THE RIGHT THING TO DO? how do i meet new people? i dont have friends what can i do in my spare time to not think about him or call him?!:( (link)
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This seems like a lot happening at once, and I'm sorry you have to go through it.
First of all, it was right for you to break things off with him. He's not a good guy. Any guy that hurts you time after time doesn't love you. And after all, look at everything you just wrote: He has
done very little good for you. You gave him everything, and he gave you little. And besides, you said he wasn't that good looking anyway.
You've graduated from high school, so there is a lot you can do. Get a job that interests you. Check the newspapers, etc. Try joining a class, like dancing and aerobics, so you can work out and maintain that hot bod and make some new friends. Losing your friends must have been hard, but life goes on. They obviously weren't your friends at all. Go to clubs, the park, roller skating rink, classes, work, etc. and look for people that interest you. Join a website like hotornot.com . Regain your confidence because I'm sure you are a gorgeous girl.
Honey, forgetting about him will take time and be hard, especially since you were with him for so long, but it's not impossible.
At one point you'll find your prince and forget about that loser. :)
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