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hey guys. i'm here to help because i feel i'm good at this stuff. i'll try my best with problems because i have probably faced them too :]. yeh, so anyway don't be afraid to ask. any smart aleck questions will get smart aleck answerss ;]. ask awayyyyyy!!

advice

hey i went out wit thise kid for 9 MONTHZ !! nd we broke up for some stupid shyt i forgot whut lol .. but he cut me =/ nd he has been havin all these new grl friends and he knows hes hurtin me real bad =[ he styll says he styll loves me and all this stuff .. when i see him he alwayz gives me hugz nd shyt like thatt .. but if he loved me he wouldnt be with her right ? =/ i love him so much im soo lostt .. he says he styll loves me and i love him so much idk whut to do .. whut should i do?? xo i love him so much

DEAR MISS SHAWTEY,


well you should seriously consider that he's hurting you and maybe you shouldn't be treated like that. i know it's hard to break up for a long term relationship, but it sounds like he's trying to play you and other girls like dangling them in your face to get you to beg for him back. you should talk to him and like seriously ask him why he loves you when he's going out with someone else bc you don't want a player for a boyfriend.


don't worry,
HEREtoHELPx3

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ok soo..
me and my bf have been goin out for like a month.. but we dont talk that much or hang out a lot, and when we do hang out we still dont talk that much. i know that hes kind of shy and prude but i am too. i dont know how to make this relationship more open and what to say or talk with.. with him. and how to be less shy around him :/ please help me..!!
xox shy girl

DEAR XOX SHY GIRL,


i think maybe you should start making conversation with him instead of waiting for him to talk to you. it might be hard but laugh and be a little more flirtacious with him maybe he'll come around. you should also talk to him about how the realtionship is heading. you might want to consider taking a break if you're not happy.


see if it works,
HEREtoHELPx3

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dear heretohelpx3,

i've been going out with this guy for like 2 weeks and he's hooked up w. girls before, but i haven't really had a boyfriend and i'm terrified to do it, but i really want to. He's trying not to pressure me, but i feel horrible for not hanging out with him enough and not doing that. I don't really know who he's friends with because we never really hung out after school a lot. I'm not allowed to have guys over my house. I don't have many friends who i hang out after school either. By the way, i'm in seventh grade.
Do you have any advice?
xo bad girlfriend

DEAR BAD GIRLFRIEND,


aw. first i think its really sweet that your boyfriend accepts that your not ready and isnt really forcing you to hook up with him even if he IS sending you hints. but anyway, i never h/u either bc i havent had a boyfriend in a few years but i could care less - i enjoy being single :). but anyways, i know im soon gna have one and i know the time will come where hes gna wna kiss me and im scared too so i asked a lot of my friends. its natural to feel scared. i would wna do it too when i have a b/f but im freaking out too lol. a lot of my friends say the guys usually know what to do and you just gotta go with the flow supposedly and after a while you get the hang of it and it gets easier. but my advice to you is even if you wna do it, dont feel pressured at all to do it - if you wna wait 15 years than do it!! but dont let him pressure you for something that you arent ready for. if he loves you then he'll understand but guys that age are very into that kinda stuff, so maybe just procrastinate (hold off) on doing it by distracting him, like maybe kissing or hugging or talking or like flirting or just lay on top of him lol. anything you feel you wna do. and you have to let him know so he doesnt feel like that you dont like him. also i would say the best time to do it is at a party or a hang-out.


did i help?,
HEREtoHELPx3

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hey :) i went out with this guy last summer and on and off 3 times before then and when our relationship ended for the 4th time he said he still likes me but he needs time and from then till now he has on and off tried to get back together with me and then wouldnt talk to me and tell me he likes this girl anamaria. now this summer we're working together at camp and im afraid that its gonna be akward and hes gonna try and ask me back out and i know i like him enough where im not gonna be able to help saying yes. how should i handle this?

xox boys suck

DEAR BOYS SUCK,


yeh, these are always difficult to deal with. um in my opinion, i dont think you should go back out with him because he keeps breaking your heart and you guys are always on and off and he's being a player saying he likes more than 2 people. but then again, it's your choice. crushes are always hard to get around. but maybe you should try to really think - "if i break up with him again, do i wna go through this awkwardness again? do i wna loose our friendship just because he wants to take a break? or do i really want someone better for me?" i dont exactly know how much you like him because maybe you gotta move on. this reminds of my kid sister. she's in 6th and she's liked this boy (lets name him Jacob) since like 2nd grade and they went out once but he dumped her for her worst enemy. lets name the enemy Katherine. but anyway - heres the story: Katherine and Jacob went out in the beginning of the year and my sister was mad. but katherine's parents didnt approve of a boyfriend so she had to dump jacob. so like in november, jacob asked my sister out and they went out for a couple months and then he dumped my sister for katherine again. katherine and jacob went out again but katherine didnt let her parents know. but a few weeks later, katherine dumped jacob and had a thousand crushes; a new one each day. but jacob always flirted with my sister. he went to all of her sport games and smiled at her in school and would always run in the hallways to catch up to her to listen to her talking to her friends. but now just today katherine and jacob are back out again but just yesterday katherine said she liked this kid (lets name him) Pete. yeh sorry i know a lot of people but its kinda like your situation. so you can kinda see how annoying katherine is with all the dumping and liking. and you can see how my sister just wont stop liking jacob. think about the questions i told you and see how you feel about it.



sorry i was rambling,
HEREtoHELPx3

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this girl named steph like sucks @ comp-WHAT SHOULD I DO?

DEAR WHAT SHOULD I DO,


im sorry. i dont really understand what you're trying to ask. now when you say comp - do you mean competition? if so, what kind?



let me know,
HEREtoHELPx3

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Okay, my boyfriend and I have been together for 5 1/2 months now. Anyway, at the beginning ont the relationship we'd be so eager to talk to eachother, and talk on the phone every night, and ditch friends for eachother, etc.

Now, we don't talk on the phone for periods of time. (Right now it's been 11 days since I've talked to him on the phone) And we hang out amazingly less, and I don't feel the urge anymore to check the computer every 5 minutes to see if he's online. When I do get to talk to him, I feel so uninterested. I could honestly go days without talking to him, and it wouldn't bug my anymore. Sometimes I cry because I don't understand what's happening, and it really upsets me. Could it be that I'm just losing interest/we both are in eachother? :(

Tuesday night on AIM I told him that I felt I was losing interest in him, and he repsonded, "Geez, I like you a lot, I can't just stop." Then he put up an away message that said, "I fucking screwed up somehow." And signed off. We eventually resolved the problem, but I feel I lied. I told him I still did like him, and I was stupid to say that. But really, I feel EXACTLY like that. I'm not as interested. What's happening? Do I WANT to get over him or something..?

Thank you.

well i dont know how old you are, but usually before like college or the end of high school - we're not REALLY in love. we just have strong feelings towards one another. we just have the urge to be wanted because we may be going through emotional trouble at home or with friends or school and that we want a partner to know who will always be on your side and help you with everything. crushes aren't as powerful as love. but like i said, i don't know but only for 5 1/2 months sounds like a crush. so i say you shouldn't just stay with him just because he feels or he THINKS he feels that he needs you. guys also want a girl to call their own. maybe you should take a break for a while and see how things go. if you're happy - keep it that way, but if you're miserable - talk to him and maybe you can get back together. don't just stay with him just for the sake of having a boyfriend.


hope i helped,
HEREtoHELPx3

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hey!! how are you?!?!im thirteen.. and lol im a girl.well heres my problem.. i like this kid.. lets call him bob.. bob is my absolute best friend thats a guy.. and i think i love bob.no i know i do.i have for a long time, since last year.bob is going out with my best freind thats a girl.bob and i are very very close he can tell me ne thing and i can tell him ne thing.. i told him the beginning of this year i liked him, and ive asked him out wenever he was single, no luck with that. but like online and stuff hes always flirting with me and he says ne guy would be happy to have me. he has nothing to offer me, he thinks im beautiful, i deserve better than him and that he loves me.. and all that stuff but i cant like ne one but him, but wen his girlfriend comes around, things like sorta change with him. he sometimes ignors me and everything. he always hugs me and everything, and i just cant help to think that there are other feelings than just his best friend inside him for me. we always get into fights and he always says im in the way.. but i was best friends with both of them before they even knew eachother,come to think of it,I hooked them up(big mistake)i just dont know what to do, i love him so much!ive nevr ever felt this way about a guy before..=/

signed,
i love my best friend

DEAR I LOVE MY BEST FRIEND,


wow, i cant tell you how many times i've heard something like this before. lol. its a sticky situation but i'll try my best to help.
well its a little weird how he likes you and he's going out with someone else. in my opinion it kinda sounds like that he does like you. and he's putting himself down by saying that you derserve a better guy and hes saying that hes not good enough for you when you think hes the perfect guy. i think maybe when he is currently dating, you should try and give them space. and once he's single again, dont rush into it so fast. ive asked out boys too. and no, thats not weird, if boys can ask out girls, girls should be able to ask out boys. but anyway, yeh i havent had luck either. maybe you should ask one of your friends to help you out or maybe at a party where there is a better chance of him saying yes.
you have to let him know you are serious about you liking him. if you dont, hes just gonna keep thinking that youre too good for him. but also since he is your best friend and if you love him as much as you make it sound - you should want him to be happy; no matter what that means. have you ever seen bruce almighty? where jim carrey loved jennifer aniston but she didnt want to love him anymore? well when he prayed, he didnt pray for her to love hm - he prayed that she would be happy. i know that means maybe never going out with him - but thats what true love is: sacraficing for the one you lovex3..
if you dont like that idea of just letting him be happy. just give him space, time, and tell him honestly but dont sound too desperate bc we dont want that happening :). sry this was so long and it might not have been helpful - but if you have problems just comment back and i'll try to think it over a little more.


hope it works,
HEREtoHELPx3

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