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So I've been texting this girl a lot and we hang out sometimes. In groups mostly, but sometimes we watch movies together. Should I ask her out to dinner or is that going too fast? (link)
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Well, if you are watching together and hanging out on occasion, then there is probably a spark in the relationship. Go for it!
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This may be a really stupid question, but how can you tell if a guy actually thinks you're attractive? I go to a school with a really messed up student population where none of the guys are really into me, but whenever I enter a new group of people (like summer programs, visit other schools, anything) I get a lot of attention. I'm going to college next year, and I'm a little confused about how to tell and I think I should probably figure that out before then :)
Also I don't think this is really allowed but how do you go about getting to know people without being awkward online? I've never really done it but now with all the college groups, I'm having to do it constantly and I'd prefer not to screw up social stuff before I even get there by being too awkward.
Thanks :) (link)
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Hmm.. tough question. Guys can be complicated, especially when you're trying to figure them out. Well first of all, words like "pretty" and "beautiful" mean more than if they say you're "hot" or "cute". They generally are associated with not purely physical looks, but you as a person, as opposed to the last two words. But besides that, it seems that you already have it figured out? Not every guy is going to think that every girl is attractive; with that being said, you already have noticed that when you go to other places, you get more attention. You seem to already be able to distinguish between someone who finds you attractive and someone who doesn't. As for the second part, I would say don't be too forward with people too quickly. Be friendly and talk about general topics, and avoid making them feel uncomfortable with lots of questions or anything like that. Just have a conversation with them how you would have one with anyone new you just met in person; it's essentially the same thing. Good luck
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I don't know what to do with him! I found out from my bff that my bf made a facebook group thing about our relationshp. I went and red a few things on it and it is personal and nothing anybody should know but us so I told him I knew he had a secret he was keeping from me but not what it was so he would tell me or something but he didn't. i kinda thought that he posted stuff and didn't think it was bad and I wanted to give him chances to say so but he just said he didnt have no secrets so i went back to read the rest and he had made it private only so now it is hidden from me.
I guess what I am asking is if he didn't think this was wrong why did he hide it when i found out? He still denies everything and now i got no proof because i cant see it anymore!!! i have been crying about this and i feel betrayed like he has a secret life on facebook or something! should i stay with him if he isn't going to be honest and still hides things?
Sorry if this is too long! (link)
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Well I'm not here to decide whether or not you should stay with him or break up; that's ultimately your decision. I do want to point out though that relationships are built off of trust, and if you don't have trust in him, then there may be a problem. The situation does sound sketchy with how he is trying to hide things, so I would suggest just confronting him about it. If he continues to deny things and see nothing wrong with what he has done, then the ball's in your court. You'll have to decide if you can remain in a relationship with someone you don't fully trust, or see if you can repair the damaged trust between you two. Trust is very fragile; it is easy to break, but very hard to rebuild. Good luck
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hi alex. soo i'd like some advice about life. why do so many people end their sentences and/or phrases with prepositions? it really hurts me. i think people do it maliciously to make me upset. what should i do?!?
-grammar FREAK (link)
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Hmm good question. Chances are they purposely do it to annoy you, like you said. From now on, whenever someone does that, just pinch them and rephrase the sentence for them. That should work. Good luck anonymous...
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Hi I think this boy is cute and yeah whatever. You're a guy, I wanna get to know him better but I don't wanna seem annoying/clingy so how should I do it? I also want like alone time but I don't wanna be the one to ask, but if I don't will nothing ever happen?! (link)
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Well first off, you can't just immediately ask him to hang out, because chances are he'll probably say no. Talk to him on the computer, text him, call him, do whatever to become better friends first. After a while, when you feel comfortable, ask if he wants to hang out, maybe in a group of mutual friends or something. You don't necessarily have to hang out in a group first, but I would suggest it because it's a good way to hang out for the first time so no one feels awkward. When you're ready, then see if just you two can hang out. When it's just you two hanging out, try and do something that would involve time to talk and get to know each other. Movies isn't really good for a first date because you can't really talk at all so it's hard to see how someone is. Good luck though
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So theres this guy and we are really good friends. he's a grade above me but we have some of the same interests. i like him, but he kinda sends me mixed signals. He also is really good friends with all my best friends, so i never know if he likes any of them... But i wanna know these mixed signals he sends me, are they really true. i also don't want it to be an awkward friendship because even though i like him, i still want to be friends with him if he doesn't like me back. i'm kinda stuck in a bad situation, please help. (link)
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People always worry that if they like a friend and they tell them and they don't like them back, it'll get awkward. The truth is, things will only become awkward if you let them. If you tell him you like him and he doesn't feel the same, then you just move on like nothing happened, no big deal. If you get uncomfortable all the time around him after that, then things are gonna be awkward. As for your situation, since the guy is good friends with all of your best friends, you could have one of your friends ask him. That way, it might just look like they were curious if he liked you, and not that you wanted to know. And if you have the confidence, then just tell him you like him. Worst case scenario is that he doesn't like you back, so what? At least you'll know sooner rather than later and you'll be able to stop liking him and move onto someone else quicker. Good luck.
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Hey Alex, I was just wondering what your thoughts were about pork swords.
From,
Link (link)
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Personally, I have no problem with pork swords in general. The only thing that creeps me out is when guys talk about their roommates' pork sword in their greasy ass cheeks, that's just taking it too far. I have a feeling this is gonna confuse a lot of people who aren't from T5
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I really like him. The only problem is hes a year below me and we don't have any classes together and I've never really talked to him. I wanna get to know him but I don't know what to start a conversation with him. Tips? (link)
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To start, you can try and send him a message on facebook. Start it off casually and ask a question and try and make it open ended. That way, when he answers, it won't be yes or no and you can start a conversation with him. From there, ask more questions to get to know each other. If you see him in school, just give him a friendly smile or something like that. Over time, you'll start to become better friends and start talking more in school. You have nothing to lose with it, the worst that will happen is you'll find out that you don't connect well. But this is at least worth a shot. Good luck with him
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i liked this kid. and he liked me for a long time. but we never ended up getting together now my bff kinda likes him and she says she doesn't like him. but she says she would never date him cause we used to like each other but we don't anymore. so is it okay that she has sex with him? cause she did! should we still be friends? and should i forgive her cause thats a really bitchy thing to do. but she did keep her promise not to "date" him! what should i do Alex!!??!!?? cause you can do Rubik cube over webcam!! ;) (link)
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Hmm well that's an awkward situation. It's hard to give advice on a case like this because it depends a lot on your own morals and values. Because like you said, she kept her promise and didn't date her, but she did have sex with him, which is kinda worse to you than dating him? That's just my opinion of it. You have to decide if the fact that she kept her promise outweighs her betrayal to you in having sex with him. So it's all up to you. In my own personal opinion, I wouldn't stop being friends with your friend just for that, but maybe I wouldn't stay as close. If she could do something like that to you, what does that say about the kind of friend she is? Good luck.
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Hey...... so..... i found this advice column and u seem like a pretty cool kid.
so anyway me and this girl used to date, but we never really had any physical stuff goin on, mostly just like feelings. but no physical stuff. then she broke up with me, but i still like her.. but i dont think she wants to get back together. she leads me on and we still hang out, but idk if i should take that as a signal or something... help =/ (link)
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So this question is kinda weird to me considering I can completely relate to it and haven't quite figured it out. The transition between a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship to a friendship can be a confusing one. The only advice I can really give in this situation (because this is what I did) is to just lay it all out on the table. Tell her what you think about how everything is. It's unfair to you to get led on when it may lead to nowhere. You need to figure out exactly how she feels so you know where you're headed. If she does still like you, then that's great. If not, you should just move on. There's no point in dwelling on the past. Sorry if that isn't much help, but I don't really have a perfect answer to this one. Good luck.
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Okay, I'm a 15 year old girl. I have this friend who's a guy who I met last summer, we became pretty good friends and after a while he told one of my friends that he liked me. At that time, though, I liked someone else who I ended up dating and then broke up with--but thats a different story. Anyways, after I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, I started to like my friend, a lot. At the beginning of this summer my friend told me I should just tell him, but I was way too nervous, so she did it for me. I was hoping he still liked me, but he said he just liked me as a friend. I was okay with that (kind of, I'm over it now) but I do still want to be friends with him and I haven't talked to him since that--all summer. What should I do? (link)
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well hey there---
sooooo, im a 16 year old boy. but with your issues, i would just talk to this friend of yours. what is the worst that could happen? if you two were friends to start, then you can still be friends. if things get weird, just talk to him about it and tell him what happened on your end.
hope it all works out-
xander.
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i have a girlfriend and weve ben going out for a couple months. i really really like her, but it seems more like a friendship, not a relationship. theres not much that makes it more then a freindship, so i dont what to do. (link)
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This is a tough topic that you really need to talk to your girlfriend about. This is a lot about opinion too. You may think that there isn't much that makes it a relationship, but she might think that she's doing enough to make it a good relationship. You should talk to her about it and how you're feeling. Tell her you think the two of you should be closer or something like that. Then you'll just have to see her response. You don't want to offend her or anything, so be careful about it. I'm sure if you approach it the right way, you can figure things out.
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okay, so i like this girl and she likes me...sounds good right?? wrong.... her ex boyfriend is a complete physco...he says hes going to kill him self if we go out and he has kinda threatened both of us. WE really like each other and i kinda just wanna ask her out but i dont want this other kid to like come and attack me. haha, well She said she was gunna try to wait till summer but i feel like that is too long! i just wanna do it butttt, i dont know :( helppp (link)
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Her ex-boyfriend is really unsafe. The whole suicidal thing isn't even a thing you should touch, he needs actual help. It's an unhealthy relationship if her ex says he'll kill himself. You should tell the girl you like to talk to her ex to try and sort things out, because the things he's talking about are just dangerous. That's not a topic that you joke about. He needs to find someone who can help him settle down and see things clearly.
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hey alex, so i took your advice and told him the guy that i like him. And he said he wants to hang out wit me before he asks me out.But he doesnt seem interested in me. He kissed me but is he just doing that because i like him? i dont want to get hurt by falling for him even harder, im so confused :( (link)
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I would say that if anything, you have things the wrong way around. He told you that he liked you first, so I wouldn't be worried about him only kissing you because you like him. He's probably worried that you don't really like him because you told him you like him after he told you. He might think that you only like him because he told you that he liked you. I think that his feelings are real for you, and that you should stop doubting your decisions. And the only way you'll fall hard is if you put yourself in a position to. You have to find a point between caring about him, but not being clingy. It's tough, and it's part of relationships, but eventually everyone figures it out. Good luck.
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Hey Alex,
so lets start by me telling you the precurrsing actions leading to this question. First I have a boy friend and a girl friend, dont take this offencivly but i cant deside what sex. anyway, the boyfriend recently cheated on me and we got into a fight. This is hard because the girl friend is not so much as i am looking for. I want to make up with him, but how.? I know the holidays are aproching and i want that to be the perfect time to make up. I am also thinking of just taking the only one date do you have advice on which to choose?
(link)
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First off, I don't find it offensive if you don't know which sex you like. Next, I would tell you that you pretty much answered yourself in your question. You said that you aren't really looking for a girlfriend, so that should tell you something. And you seem to really want to make up with your boyfriend, so you should at least talk to him about what happened. When you do this, you have to be calm or it will just turn into a bigger fight. Ask him yourself what happened so you can know the truth, and see if he apologizes for it. If he does, decide whether or not you think he really means it or if he's just saying it. If he means it, then you should talk to him about getting back together. If it seems fake, then you can decide what to do from there. And you're right, the holidays are a good time to make-up. Maybe you can buy him a little gift or something to ease the tension a little. Hope that helps.
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hey Alex, This boy that i like asked me about my love life and who i like. i wasnt sure what to say, so i changed the subject but i really want him to know. about last week he told me he likes me. I dont want it to seem like i like him just becuase he likes me, what should i do? should i tell him even if the next day might seem awkard since i always see him...... (link)
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In my personal opinion, I would tell him. I know lots of people who have "secret admirers", but really, what's the point? If the person you like doesn't know it, you'll pretty much never have a chance. I've always been one to just say it how it is, no matter if it does become awkward. If you don't make it awkward, it won't be. Just because you say you like him after he told you, I don't think he'll assume it's because he told you. I think he'll trust you in what you're saying, and hopefully you guys can go from there. If he really likes you, and you really like him, then there should be no problem. He told you, so you should return the favor. But don't forget, this is all just my advice to you. Listen to whatever parts you want, and I hope it turns out for the best.
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hi alex,I really dont get guys, especially this one guy that i have been talking to for a while now.He is a sweet and nice guy, and he always makes me smile. recently he told me that he likes me,and i have been doing a lot of thinking about him, i just cant get him out of my mind. i want to be more than friends with him,but i dont think he feels the same way even tho he telles me he cares about me and that he likes me. Im so confused, i really dont whant to get hurt again, but then again i want to take this risk.. wat should i dooo??? (link)
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Guys are different than girls. Girls generally are better with expressing themselves, unlike guys. Guys usually have trouble showing the real side of themselves and can sometimes come off wrong. If he told you he likes you, then I would say you should believe him. In relationships, there has to be a sense of trust on both sides. Even if he doesn't act like he cares about you, I'm sure he does. Guys sometimes put up a sort of shield to prevent themselves from being hurt. If he says he likes you, he's at least putting down his barrier a little, so he trusts you. You have to return the favor. I would say believe in what he's saying, and hopefully it will work. Good luck.
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Alex, I really like you. I'm not really sure if you like me back, sometimes when you look at me I get these little butterflies in my tummy. You're so romantic and handsome. You answering all these questions just proves to me that you're a kind and caring person. We hang out a lot sometimes. I also like your best friend, Atticus. He's really dreamy and has a great personality. When we're all together, I just get so confused on who to pick to like. I always look for your screen name whenever I sign online. I just like to stare at it, because I'm too scared to im you. You're so dreamy, but so is Atticus. Help me baby! (link)
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I'm gonna assume this is fake, but it was entertaining to read.
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what if I am a really shy person, what should i do then?
(link)
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My advice still wouldn't change. In order for anyone to like someone, they need to talk and get a relationship going, even if it's as friends. You have to become friends with someone before you can become anything more. Sorry but that's really all the advice I can give you.
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alex brother im liking a girl but were real good friends. she doesnt seem to acknowledge me as anything more than a friend. what can i do to make her wanna consider us more than friends (link)
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I'd say the first thing you have to do is tell her. If she doesn't know you like her, she won't have any reason to look at you differently. If she knows you like her, then she'll have to consider if she likes you and that will at least get her thinking about you. And if you're good friends with her, then you guys should hang out sometime. If you think it would be too awkward just you two, then hang out in a group. If she doesn't like you, it wouldn't be a big deal, you guys can just go back to being friends, and you'll have to move on. Good luck.
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