Hi I'm a 27 year old female from British Columbia, Canada. I work in retail as a sales assoicate. I have an above average intelligence about relationships and mental health issues and love giving advice to those in need. My parents bitterly divorced when I was 13 and through this I learned a lot about relationships. I've also lived through a severe depression and mental breakdown in my early twenties, so I know a lot about mental health. If anyone has a question for me about either of these topics I would be glad to answer as best to my abililty. I would just like to add how much joy this site had brought to my life. I truly believe that by helping others you help yourself.
Website: Life Is What You Make It
Gender: Female
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Occupation: Sales Associate
Age: 27
Member Since: September 20, 2005
Answers: 75
Last Update: August 31, 2007
Visitors: 8652
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I am a very honest and driven person. I think this makes me good at what I do for a living. Even so I have a boss that micromanages me and takes credit for my work. She also belittles me even though I have an amazing track record at managing people and I have the numbers to prove it. I guess my question is how do you deal with a dishonorable boss who finds little things wrong and makes your life miserable? I love my job just not my boss. (link)
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I know exactly how you feel. I have a boss a lot like yours. She is always talking behind my back that I'm not doing a good job and she will belittle me in front of others even though I'm one of the nicest; hardest workers in the department. It honestly sounds to me that your boss is clearly jealous of you; and maybe even a little bit threatened by you. My advice to you is; although it may be hard the best thing to do is to ignore it. Your boss is probably just unhappy with her job and probably her life in general. Picking on you is probably her way of letting of steam. Try not to take it personally either. Another thing I do is to go in and ALWAYS be pleasant to her and the other employers when she is around. Even on days when she is clearly being a bitch or is in a pissy mood I will be nice and have a positive attitude. It is my way of showing to her and everyone else that I'm not going to get me down. AND; if things really get bad- you could always go to her superior and let them know what is going on.
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I don't attract guys at all. It's been said that I'm a lesbian (which I'm not), and I have an extremely brutal (but with purpose...I don't just say "Fuck the world" for no reason and think it's funny) sense of humor and wear all black. Are these turn-offs? But I'm a nice person. Though I can be a little morbid, I'm generally pretty friendly, I consider others' feelings, and I try to make friends, but nobody at my school wants to be around me. It's inevitable someone will say "Marian, I REALLY wanna sit next to Joe Shmoe. Can you move over?" at least twice a day. I just hate that. Whenever we have to choose partners/teams in gym, I'm always the last person. I feel so lonely, I cry sometimes in the locker room when nobody is around. There's only 1 friend of mine that's a guy who actually appreciates me for who I am, and I now have such a huge crush on him. I don't want to sound conceited at all, but I think I'm a nice-looking person, so that eliminates the idea that guys might not like me because of my looks. Does anyone understand? How can I make more friends? Even though he doesn't like me back in the same way, should I tell this boy I like him, and if so, how?
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Well I think having a brutal sense of humour, being a little morbid, and dressing all black is probably very intimidating to most guys. Try to put yourself in their shoes. Most guys are already insecure enough about being rejected by girls; so would probably be more comfortable firting with or asking out the girls that look more approachable.
When I was in highshool, guys only dated the girls who dressed feminine like, and had sweet dipositions. And I'm not saying that you don't have these qualities, but your appearance would probably seem otherwise. I also remember that the guys seemed to be disgusted with the girls who acted or dressed differently. There was one girl who had a purple fro and she always wore black. The guys teased her mercilessly.
There is a saying: Don't judge a book by it's cover. I've always believed this, but unfortuneatly, not every person; especially in highschool is this open minded.
If you really want to fit in, you'll have to dress more conservatively, and be less morbid; basically; not being YOU. And do you really want to compromise who you are just to fit in with some immature, superficial teenage boys?
So my advice is to just be true to yourself. You say that you have one true friend? Well that is better than having 20 phoney, superficial friends. I think you're doing fine. I was sort of an outcast in highschool too, so I know what you're going through, and how lonely it is. But you know what? After highschool, people grow up. You'll meet tons of people in college and in the workplace that you can relate to without having to change who you really are. Besides, most guys in highschool are too immature to be in a serious relationship anyways.
I hope that what I've said has made some sense, and that you'll feel better about things.
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alright it always seems that when my brother has friends over that im always home, because all my friends are busy and there is no one to talk to on the phone. Now his friends are really hot so i dont want them to think im a loser its just a cowinsdense (sp) that im home when he has his friends over, and no i dont do it on purpose. I try calling people to talk so i dont look like a dork but of course no one is home when i need them . What do around the house so they dont think im a loser? and i know like watching t.v or something but last time i did that one of his friends went " why is she sitting there watching tv"
ill rate high for ANYTHING. (link)
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I think this is a great opportunity for you to build some muscle and get in awsome shape!! You don't need a lot of money or a gym membership either. If I were you, invest in a portable cd disc player, the kind with the headphones. Also buy a pair of good running shoes if you don't already have some, and a nice tract suit. Then whenever your brother brings his hot friends over, put on your tract suit, and head out the door!! You don't have to run, just walk briskly. The tunes will help motivate you to keep going. Walking can do wonders for your health, and it will help you lose or maintain weight. Also, your brothers friends will be really impressed and think what cute, health concsious little sister their friend has. It will look WAY better than just having you sit by the television!!
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I'm so pissed! I take this lyrical class for beginners because its my first year. I've been taking dance for 5 years though, so I'm pretty good. All the other kids in my class SUCK! They're horrible and look so awkward. Even though I'm one of the best in my class I feel like the worst.
My teacher corrects every LITTLE thing I do wrong. I'm the only one she's ever correcting! Everyone else sucks, but they still don't get anything negative on their dancing!! She claims that she's doing me a "favor" my correcting me, but why doesn't she do all THEM a favor and help them cuz they need it more than I do?? My friend tells me that this teacher pushes the people who are good. i don't know if this applies to me though. As you can see i'm REALLY pissed about this because I'm used to being the best at everything... school, sports, you name it! (link)
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I can relate to what you're going through. I used to be in dance lessons when I was a young teen. But I found that the opposite was true with me. My dance teacher never corrected the really good dancers, infact she adored them. But she hated me because I was one of the worst ones. She always rode my ass in class. She even had the nerve to YELL at me, yes YELL at me in front of the whole class because I failed to show up to a rehearsal before a performance. It was so bad that I dropped out of the class. I think she did this to me hoping that I would drop out because she thought I was shit and was embarrassed to have me dance with the ones that she thought were really good.
If you are as good as you say you are ( I'm sure you are dear), then I really have no idea why she would be doing this to you. You would think she would be praising you, and making an example out of you. If you are her best dancer, you should be a model student to the others.
If I were you I would make an appointment to speak to your teacher after or before class. Tell her your concerns, and let her know that you don't appreciate her always picking on you, especially when you're one of the best dancers. If she won't give you a good explanation, or apologize for her behavior, I think you should switch to either a different class or a new dance school where they will treat you with the respect that you deserve.
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