Let experience be your guide.....my experience! If you want serious advice from an adult go ahead....ASK away! With extraordinary interpersonal skills, I will respond to your questions respectfully, and give practical solutions and reasonable answers.
Gender: Female
Location: Texas
Occupation: teacher
Member Since: June 9, 2004
Answers: 86
Last Update: May 20, 2006
Visitors: 6860
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I went to work today and my boss asked me if I'd be interested in transferring to another department in the store. It's a new clothing line that won't be ready until March. She said I would be gauranteed at least 25 hours a week, and I would have a new supervisor.It would sort of be a promotion I guess. I said yes, and now I'm worried that some of the other girls in my department might get jealous. This one girl in the department had really wanted into this new clothing line, and she was going to ask the manager if she could transfer because she was too scared to ask our supervisor. Our supervisor can be a little mean a times (that's an understatement). Well my supervisor aproached ME,, and asked me before this other girl. I also have seniority over her. I just know she is going to be really pissed off and jealous of me. But I HAD to except this job, because I was only getting 15 hours a week in the other department. Also, I get along really well with the lady that is going to be my new boss. How should I act around her when I see her again? I don't want to make any enemies! And before this we got along really well! (link)
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You said it yourself, 'she was going to ask the manager if she could transfer but, then she is not qualified enough to do a job that requires polished skills. Life is competitive; You both wanted the job and the boss is going to choose the more qualified. She will get over it in time. If she is a decent person, she will say congratulations and wish you the best. If she gets mad, pouts or gossips about you.......good riddance to the likes of her!
Don't feel guilty, just act like you always do. Say hello, smile, be yourself. If she is jealous or acts rude or cold, just go on with your work. Do not get involved in arguments or petty exchanges that could kill your job opportunities. Managers want workers to stay focused on the job, not to be acting like immature teenagers. Good luck and enjoy your success.
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I work with an elderly lady who can't seem to mind her own business. I'm the office manager and so she blames me for all her failings, like not getting raises, not being allowed to check voicemail, etc. She won't be honest with me about the way she feels yet she has no problem running her mouth about me and everyone else to anyone willing to listen. We have a very small office, there is only 5 of us here. So of course everyone knows what she says b/c that's how gossip is. Anyway, she's making my work difficult and making up lies to the boss and I want it stopped. How can I do this without stooping to her level? (link)
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A direct approach is the best. Tell your boss the types of problems that you are experiencing with this person. Assure them that you are seeking advice from them on how THEY want you to handle it, rather than "tattling". This way, you will be handling it the way they suggest and you are seeking their professional advice. If this direct approach with the boss isn't possible, then try an indirect approach:
Tell your boss that you have some ideas to help keep the office running efficiently (or to make it run more efficiently) and ask if you can call a 15 to 20 minute meeting to communicate with staff as a whole. Your boss may want you to run these ideas by him/her first. If so, use "I" statements when speaking to your boss to avoid placing blame on someone directly (the elderly lady). This can direct attention to the problem that you are havng with her by letting the boss draw their own conclusions about whom you may be speaking. If this person complains to everyone in a small office, I'm sure that your boss is already aware in some way. For example, you can say to your supervisor, "I want to communicate with the employees that I am open to hear their ideas/constructive criticisms and want to get some feedback from them in improving the management of the workplace."
Once you get the okay (or have called a meeting), address the whole group (avoiding any direct body language or lingering eye contact with the complainer) and say, "I'd like to take this opportunity to have your input on some ways to make the office run more efficiently" or "I'd like to hear your ideas on what would make our office a(n)___________________ (encouraging, positive, less stressful, etc.) place to work." You can listen to their ideas and/or suggestions. After everyone has had a chance to contribute THEN you make a statement to this affect, "I appreciate your ideas, suggestions and time. I want to maintain an open and PROFESSIONAL line of communication and avoid any conversations that are more in the line of office gossip. Let's all help one another by communicating in this professional way and redirect anyone who is having difficulties to go to the source of the problem, rather than burdening others with discussions that seem more like complaints or gossip." This will deliver your message both to the complainer and to the people who have to listen to her. It states your position in front of everyone, without placing blame on any one person. See if this helps curb future problems. Remember, people will continue with bad habits and unprofessional conduct if they think they can get away with it.
It may take more than once to get her to stop "running her mouth". If she continues, you can send an email or memo with a copy to your supervisor, in which you remind her of the meeting in how to communicate professionally. In your email, try to use her exact phrasing or her original words used to colleagues and this will highlight the problems to your supervisor. For example, you could write/say, "I am sorry to hear that you feel I am impeding your chances for a raise and would like to help you ease the stress you are feeling. How can I be of assistance to you as your office manager?" That will show that you are approaching her whining and gossip with professionalism and are willing to listen to her. It also shows your boss what kind of sour worker she is versus what kind of professional manager you are in the workplace. Always document in writing when you have contact with her in emails, in person and on the phone (complete with dates). This comes in handy when dealing with her. For example, "So-and-so, I hear that you are still having trouble with your voice mails. We spoke about this on October 25th and I suggested _________________________. Is that not working out for you?" Your supervisor will appreciate how professional you are and see that you are earnestly trying to curb her wayward tongue without losing your cool. Good luck and let me know how it turns out.
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ok . heres my deal , im going into high school on aug. 23 , and i really want to get a boyfriend for the first time cuz ive never dated b4 . im getting braces to which might turn a guy off . how can i get a boyfriend evn tho braces r a total turn off (link)
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You are getting braces to improve the looks and condition of your teeth for the future....and THIS is terrific. So many people have braces in high school, that you won't be the only one. If you are still bothered by the thought of braces, discuss the different types that are offered with your parents. They do have clear braces, but they are more expensive. One more important detail, when you do get braces, be thorough about cleaning your teeth after eating. Carry a toothbrush in your purse and clean up after eating lunch (especially at school). NOT having anything caught in your braces and having fresh breathe will make you feel more confident.
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I am having a big problem on my job. I am a licensed nurse working in Home Care in Florida. What is commonly called Agency work. There are several nurses working this particular Case. We all are experienced nurses, and adore our little patient, which is a handicapped child. We all have been on this particular job for several years,and everyone does a good job. One nurse who I will call N, causes a lot of unneccessary friction on this home case. The father of this child is alone, and is a divorced, retired older man. And he is the primary care giver for this child. N has been intimately involved with this gentleman, off and on for a couple of years. She works the night shift and sleeps. She manipulates this man, and the shedule changes according to her wishes.When he leaves town on business trips, she comes and goes in the home, and causes problems for whichever nurse is working at that time. The agency is aware that she sleeps and that she is imtimately involved with this pts father. But has done nothing to rectify this situation. I learned ethics and conflict of interest when I studied nursing, but obviously some people do not follow this guidelines. Besides this , the nurses brags about being able to work 2 jobs. If everyone working in nursing could sleep, then everyone could work two jobs. She is married and has children. Besides this nurse being liable, and the agency. Should medicare also be advised of this situration? Nurses are threatening to leave this home case, if nothing changes and soon. What about the licensure agency, here in Florida? Thanks in advance for reply (link)
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The world is full of users and this woman is one of them. You said you reported it and nothing was done. Since the man has been romantically involved with her, perhaps they feel it is his choice to let her sleep. However, sleeping on the job when you are supposed to be responsible for a child is serious. A situation might arise that could result in the child being injured from neglect (choking, falling out of bed, etc.). If the Home Care agency won't respond, then PLEASE report it to the licensing agency. The thought of a lawsuit from neglect or malpractice seems to make health care facilities straighten up. My mother is in a nursing home facility and I make weekly appearances and spend time talking with my mother to check that they are fufilling the duties that she pays for each month, to ensure the best of care. They respond quickly when I tell them that the state licensing board would be interested in what I have to say.
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I got a job at a pizza restaurant. I've worked for the same chain several years ago (a different location). I filled out the application online, made some nice customer comments about that particular location because it's my favorite place, and the owner called me last night! I was feeling really down when he called, so I look at this as a good sign, because it really made me feel better. This may sound totally lame or corny to you, but I'd much rather being doing something, even if it's just making pizzas, or taking orders for them, then sitting around at home being broke. I need to help out my family, but I also feel better about myself when I'm working, like I'm "contributing to society " by having a job. Ok, so I'm not curing cancer, but treating people nice can really make the difference in somebody's day, and I will be working with the public, which I know I can do. It's been a long time since I've worked a cash register, but it didn't look hard, I'm planning to stay there as long as I need to to save money and go back to school to finish my child development credits, but I didn't tell the boss that. I think I conviced this new boss that I can handle it, so why am I so nervous? Any suggestions? I start my training friday. (link)
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I worked my way through college doing all sorts of jobs from mowing lawns to cutting fabric in a discount store. Your positive attitude about having a goal and treating people nicely are admirable. That is exactly what I did.....treated people fairly, honestly and with human dignity. You are nervous because you want to do well and do not want to disappoint your boss or yourself. Do your job as if it were the most important work in the world and your boss and customers will notice immediately. Be considerate of your coworkers, too. Remember, being nice and doing a good job does not mean you have to put up with rude or pushy behavior from anyone...boss, coworkers, or customers. So if a problem arises, refer it to the manager, unless it is with the manager! Then be direct, firm and honest.
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ive been crushing on this guy for a while and so i told my best friend. Her bf and the guy i like are good friends so i had him to talk to the guy. He said that he liked me but wasnt looking for a relationship right now. Its summer break so when school starts back up again should i go for it?? of move on. (link)
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Move on..... for now. If this guy has been told that you like him, the ball is in his court. Don't wait around for him if someone new comes along. Summer, is usually a time to hang out with friends and do fun things that you can't enjoy while school is in session. This guy might want to stay carefree while he has no pressures of school on him.
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