I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
Gender: Male
Member Since: December 31, 2006
Answers: 3591
Last Update: August 30, 2022
Visitors: 141351
Main Categories:
Mental health
Parenting
Doesn't Fit Any Of These Categories
View All
|
| |
|
well i been heartbroken over this guy named josiah for 4-5 years, we were close and almost dated. he led me on and used me til didnt need me anymore, and is my first love, kiss who lost virginity to etc. we ent from talking alot flirting etc to all sudden it stopped. idk why still, and foundout from someone that is married now. i tried sending a friend request on facebook, playing it off as dont have these feelings still, but denied request but didnt block. want talk to him so badly, as did have a miscarriage of his child and never griefed properly as kept it from my family cause they lecture me about having feelings for him tho thats not something i can help , tried everything i could think of to move on, and now in a relationship with lance, who treats me like queen do care for just not as much as do josiah. he knows had thing for him in past, as told him how he hurted me badly emotionally dont think it was intentional tho cuase he's best guy i ever knew before lance. what should i do? and want make my current relationship work though im just settling for lance since cannot have josiah like we were... (link)
|
It's been something you haven't been able to let go of for a long time even though he's become married to someone else. He sees you as the past and doesn't have any interest. He ignored your Facebook request hoping you would move along. He likely won't talk to you again
While it's not wrong to reach out to people it is if it's been this long, you know they are married and trying to tell yourself it wasn't because you still have feelings, You need to see a therapist because this isn't normal behavior at this point. Most people can move past this quickly but for years you have held on to this whereas you are a distant memory to him. For some reason you think you still have a chance or can pick up some form of relationship from him, Be honest..
I don't know what you think will happen if you try talking to this person either.. Why must you so badly? You're in a relationship now and bound to end up hurting yourself and the other person if you allow your past relationship and these feelings to invade your present.
You need to talk with a therapist and work through all of these issues and how you feel about your current relationship because the other person has moved on and you are to have been expected to by now.
You can't make this person come back to you, love you or make it the way it once was expecially if he is married and has moved on in life. That's not reality and nothing would give you that. There's nothing you can do to change this fact. I think that's what you are unable to grasp and it is a problem.
The guy was hoping you would move on and didn't block you out of being nice and or wanted to monitor what you were doing in trying to reach him and motivation why. You didn't do anything inappropriate or abusive yet so blocking you wasn't necessary unless you wouldn't leave him alone. But yes, you have to chuck these feelings for him and learn how to finally move forward. If you can't do it alone therapy will help.
|
|
Rating: 5
| |
thanks for the advice, he was also my best friend so that makes i harder and am seeing a therapist and not obsessed or harming him. do really love him which hurts me to not be enough for, but happy for him though it hurts me on being married. and i've tried evrything rid these feelings for him and able o make myself live without..but will talk to my new therapist about it, and hope for best as would been nice be least friends again..well thanks again he does care about me he told my mom and she told me and lectured me.
|
|