Member Since: November 3, 2015
Answers: 80
Last Update: February 16, 2018
Visitors: 3831
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Years ago when I was around the age of 13 going on 14, I was friends with this guy (he was 17). We both had a group of mutual friends, so we camped out one night. Me and him were in the same side of the tent, and he started kissing me, which I was okay with, and we did other stuff, which I was also okay with. Then he asked me if I was a virgin and, of course, I said yes because I was, and I wanted it to stay that way! I told him that I was, and he said ''we won't have sex then'' and I said ''okay''. A few seconds later he put it in anyway, and I had no idea what to do. It took me a while to realise what was happening (I was a virgin, I didn't know what sex felt like!), and when I did I started panicking, I had no idea what to do, I thought it was too late to tell him to stop. So we ended up having sex, and when we eventually finished, I cried myself to sleep, and the next day I rushed home as quick as possible, not telling anyone. And the very next day I felt so ashamed of myself that I did it again, I slept with him, again. I've been beating myself up about it and I take my virginity very seriously, before then I had a purity ring! I started to feel very depressed after that, and I tried to kill myself. Every time I think about it I cringe, panic and cry. How do I stop thinking about it? Did I lose my virginity to him or was he taking advantage of me? Please help!! (link)
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I am so sorry this happened to you.
yes you lost your virginity and yes unfortunately he took advantage of you :(
That was your time to say no but understandably you were afraid.
Im pretty sure you cant stop thinking about it because you werent ready and because of how it happened.
We all have high expectations of our first time and lots of times its never right!
Stop beating yourself up over it!
Please forgive yourself!!! you are not a horrible person for this and you are still pure.
This was an unfortunate circumstance and it doesnt have to happen again until you are ready.
This is not worth you taking your life... you are SO much more than this.
I believe the healing will begin when you start to forgive yourself. When you think back it will hurt you but it wont be as bad. Dont let one bad situation make your life bad. We all have experienced bad things, but we learn and grow from it.
I dont know you but I know that this doesnt make you a bad person and I know that you can move past this. There is no need to keep thinking about it and allow it to ruin you and your future relationships. Dont give this guy that much credit he isnt worth it but YOU are!
wishing you all the best and a beautiful life xx
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