Member Since: June 30, 2014
Answers: 133
Last Update: June 29, 2016
Visitors: 6522
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Hello, I'm nineteen and female, he is 19 as well. We started talking at the end of sophomore year in college and we parted ways for the summer where he went home to Jersey and I to Pennsylvania. However, we've been texting non stop everyday. A few times he's told me that he's changing his mind about commitment and how he wants a girlfriend and how he wants it to be me but I told him I was never in a very committed relationship so I told him I need time to think if that's what I want. He knows I like him and care about him and I know he cares about me so he let me think about it. I went away with my family for a weekend to our cabin in the mountains and didn't have any cell service, when I came back and we were talking again, he was different and I asked him what was wrong and he said while I was gone, he did some thinking that he doesn't want a girlfriend anymore and that hurt because while I was away, I decided that I wanted to be with him and commit to him but he changed his mind.
I got over that and we were still talking like we used to, hanging out and hooking up and being cute. That lasted for a while until I noticed him not being the same again and we talked about it and he said he's losing feelings, he still cares a lot but not as much as he used to. So, I gave him space. I thought we weren't really getting along and I thought it was best that we got over each other. It's been a few days that we haven't talked since he said that and we got into a fight about how every time I wanted to give up on us, he always pulled me back telling me we can work it out but when he wants to pull away, I can never bring him back.
It's been a few days and he texted me and just asked what was up, like nothing happened so I blatantly asked where he was on the scale of being over this and me and he said it definitely isn't a ten. I was on my way to fully getting over him and ever since he said that, it's like it drew me back to him.
I just can't seem to get over him and it sucks. I deleted his number and told him I need time away to get over him because he's definitely working on getting over me as our conversations are getting so short and we fight all the time and he isn't being cute to me like he used to. I even unfollowed him on twitter and instagram so I don't have to see him or hear from him and we even got into a fight about that. He doesn't understand the whole "out of sight, out of mind" thing and I told him that's what that was that if I don't see his face on instagram, it would be easy for me to get over him and he got mad at that.
I'm just getting sick of the games. I thought that if I talked to him about other guys that that would help me to get over him, like hanging out wise. He even got mad at that saying "I don't care what you do with them, I'm not involved. Don't talk to me about other guys that you would give a change, it's like you're rubbing them in my face." But I brought up that he can talk to me about his work friends ALL THE TIME to which he said "yea, work friends, not girls that I would date or hook up with." I'm sick of the games and the double standards and how when he says one thing, it just draws me right back to him.
So, the point of this is.. why do you think we fight all the time (as that is what broke up apart mostly) and why is he getting so mad at me for the dumbest things? He decided he didn't want to be with me yet he gets mad at me when I talk about other guys. And, lastly, how do I get over him?
Thanks. (link)
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Hi angel!! Wow!!! Your hands are full!!!
Ive been in your situation,and it sucks so bad!!
So,let's start with this dude. He's definately playing a tug of war with you which is not right.Playing with someone's emotions is careless,as that what he has done
Now then,your heart is heavy,and I understand.
It seems to me like he doesn't know what he wants!
He may also have liked the convinience of having someone around but not really committed.
Also,you may have heard of the term''I don't want to be alone,but I also want to be alone''
It may be where he is at right now.He doesnt know what he wants.
I applaud your efforts into getting him ''out of site and out of mind''
Sometimes when you train your mind into thinking that youre over the person you like,chances are your mind will get the message and he will be out of site and mind.
Distract yourself with various activities.How about painting? Maybe take an acting class and be the next Jennifer Lawrence?!! How about writing a kids book? Choose something that will grab your intrest while also being fun and rewarding you to make a positive choice in your life!!!
Be blessed!
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