Imperfectionist's advice column

askImperfectionist

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: So, this weekend just gone I had sex with a guy. Him and his girlfriend were split up at the time and he said they weren't getting back together so I didn't see much of a problem. But the next day he said they sorted things out but he didn't tell her about me and him.

I'm really not comfortable about this as I'm friends with alot of her friends so I'm gunna see her about alot and I hate keeping secrets and lying.
I've tried persuading him, but said I won't say a word until he says something to her 'cause she should really hear it from him not me or someone else. But this also means I can't talk to any of my friends about it, which sucks.
He won't tell her though as she has alot of family problems at the moment and doesn't think she'd be able to handle it and isn't sure what she'd do (guessing he means self harm etc).

Some sort of help would be great as I'm really not keen on this situation and can't chat to anyone! Thank you!

If he really wasn\'t with her when you two had sex he didn\'t cheat on her and he isn\'t obligated really to tell her nor are you because that means you are just inserting yourself into a dramatic situation. For all he knows his girlfriend could have been with someone else why they weren\'t together too. So I would just mind your business especially if it\'s going to contribute to issues to her mental health. And if any of your mutual friends are really your friends you should be able to talk to them (not saying you have to tell every single one of them just the ones you are very close with) without them telling her.

Rating: 4

As far as I know they argued and broke up the same night, and fully know she didn't sleep with anyone that night.

bio

Hi, thanks for coming to my column.

The name is Diamond but Dia is fine.

20, female, jersey girl at heart. mixed race taurus natured woman.

So...the reason I made this was during the start of my senior year of high school I had reached a point in my life where I didn't want to live anymore. I was tired of fighting and didn't see the reasons to fight. It was a random stranger that made me realize I would be stupid to take my life and to stop fighting.

So if you think I'm going to tell you life gets easier, I'm not. Let's face it, it doesn't get easier. Through pain you get stronger and learn to open your eyes to those things that give you strength to live.

Mine happen to be music, writing, dr. pepper, anime, the color black, the way rain sounds, and an amazing boyfriend. What gives you strength to live?