askImperfectionist
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Q: Coke head is being a little harsh. But one of my best friends jumped into a relationship a few weeks after ending a really long relationship. The guy was nice enough when I first met him and I'm happy if she's happy. Until I found out that he does coke "every now and then." It really disgusts me because I come from a family with three brothers who are drug addicts. (Luckily they don't do it anymore but still hate any kind of hard drug.)
He tells her that he won't do it anymore and she keeps saying she has no reason to not believe him yet. But I'm just worries about her. I know she's a big girl and can make up her own mind but it makes me have a dislike towards him, which may not be fair to him-but I'm only human and trying to process my feelings towards the situation. So I don't really ask her questions about him and when she brings him up I listen but don't really ask questions so I think she knows I'm not his number one fan. Which makes me sad cause she's my best friend and I feel as if we are creating a wedge in our friendship. They hang out literally everyday and night and she rarely has time to hang out anymore. I know this is life and being 22 means it's only gonna get worse as far as seeing friends go because everyone will get married as I age. I'm also in a long distance relationship so it's hard being far from him and feeling lonely at the same point sometimes.
I really just wish she was better about fitting me into her life still because I do miss her and care about her. At least in her old relationship she was good about making time for me and her girlfriends.
Honestly talk to her. tell her pretty much everything you just said...but don't call him a coke head. I have a history of addicts in my life and I totally understand the not being a fan of him or being a fan of those type of people. If she is your friend, she'll understand why you are a little iffy because you've seen what addiction can do to people and how addicts can effect everyone around them. With that being said try to be there for her anyway because you are her friend and it's the best thing you can do. Try to get to know him or at least on a civil level. Be there for her when she needs you and watch him to make sure he doesn't drag her down the path with him.

Thank you!!!

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Imperfectionist
Hi, thanks for coming to my column.

The name is Diamond but Dia is fine.

20, female, jersey girl at heart. mixed race taurus natured woman.

So...the reason I made this was during the start of my senior year of high school I had reached a point in my life where I didn't want to live anymore. I was tired of fighting and didn't see the reasons to fight. It was a random stranger that made me realize I would be stupid to take my life and to stop fighting.

So if you think I'm going to tell you life gets easier, I'm not. Let's face it, it doesn't get easier. Through pain you get stronger and learn to open your eyes to those things that give you strength to live.

Mine happen to be music, writing, dr. pepper, anime, the color black, the way rain sounds, and an amazing boyfriend. What gives you strength to live?

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