I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
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Member Since: December 31, 2006
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Last Update: August 30, 2022
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I recently met a guy... things were intense. We connected on a deep, emotional level from the beginning. We hung out three days in a row, and I felt so comfortable with him. He ended up spending the night after our third date. Things were so natural and unpretentious from the start.
I am in limbo with my masters program though. I am on the verge of being dismissed, and he knows that... I was stressed about it and we talked it over. I was even stressed after he spent the night. But things were so easy and natural for us. I have never had such a deep connection with another guy before, it felt so amazing.
So fast forward to today, when I texted him:
Tonight, i texted him to see what his plans are for tomorrow. He said he might meet with a friend then asked what i am doing tonight. I told him plans for tonight fell through, but I could meet for a bit before he headed out to some party. He told me he was working but would let me know how he felt. Then texted me later on saying he was going to take a nap before heading to an all night party. SO.... I texted back asking him to let me know if he wants to meet for a bit before, otherwise I could hang out tomorrow.
I haven't heard from him, it's been a couple hours and I know he's out now which is cool. But I don't know what to make of the vibes of his texts? He hasn't initiated anything, aside from saying he'll let me know what his plans are later...not asking to hang out. I don't know if he is losing interest, or if i come across as clingy? I just felt this incredible connection with him and don't want to lose it. (link)
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Let him approach you. See what he does this week or you will seem clingy. However, I do think the writing is on the wall.
He's no longer in to you. If he was interested in you don't you think that he would have taken you to that all night party? I don't buy that he's working either as he has been giving you an excuse every time you mention hanging out.
My advice is to try an salvage your university program and get help now with that and forget this guy. Sometimes life is like that we have connections with people at first that seem like they'll last and then they unfortunately die out.
The other thing is that he could be the kind of guy that's a pig. I mean he could be a creep who appears to connect with a girl and then has nothing to do with her post sexual encounter. i hope not but just making you aware of the possibility.
Here's what I would do: wait a week and let him come to you without you texting him PERIOD for any reason and see if he has any real interest in you.
Then if he doesn't move on as he'll drive you nuts and waste your time which looks like he's doing. You don't need your feelings crushed by someone who is too cowardly to say "You're a nice girl but I'm not interested."
I know you don't want to lose that intense feeling and brief connection but I know for sure that someone better is around the bend for you that you'll really feel passionate about.
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Rating: 5
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Thanks, this clarifies a lot for me...it is painful to face the truth, but I have a strong feeling I'll have to move on.
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