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Okay so I know this is going to sound like an odd relationship, but my bf and i dont keep secrets from eachother. At all. Well at least thats how he wanted it to be. He told me he never minds if i look at his phone, or if i ask him anything he will always tell me, and he wants me to do the same...and i have been doing that, i always let him look at my texts or sometimes he will on his own nd i dont mind.
Now, last Saturday we got into a fight, and on Sunday we were together becuz we went to lunch with his family. He was texting his friend, and I asked him what about? and he didnt answer so I looked at his phone but he had deleted the convo. So I asked him, hey soo what did you talk about and he said some bs answer that was random.

Later that evening, him, me and his friend and friends brother were all hanging out and my bf and his friends brother went to see his new apartment, while me and his friend stayed back to watch this show we both love. Now during this time, his friend says to me "heyy so how come you said that yesterday?" (referring to the fight i had with my bf) and I was like "What? He told you that?" and he says "Yeah look" and he shows me the whole convo he had deleted off his phone. My instincts were right, my bf had lied to me, because the text was saying all this stuff about me, not really bad stuff, but still it wasnt nice either. He was telling his friend how I was "bitching" and I "ruined his night" etc. If i had seen that earlier on his phone I wouldnt have gotten mad because its just how he feels about our fight and he was telling his friend, its fine. But what made me mad was that he LIED to me about it, something that hes always had this thing with honesty saying how oh, if you ever take your confidence away from me its going to be over because I never once gave you a reason to doubt me blah blah, and truth is he only did once, until now. (i found out about that too) so honestly i felt kinda like well you've lied twice already so i feel kinda betrayed u know?
So even tho i promised his friend i wouldnt say he showed me, I did bring it up to him. I said that why is it that you deleted the text today? What didnt you want me to see? and he says why are you so paranoid it wasnt even about u? thats when i got mad i was like hey i have reason to ask ok I saw the conversation. And i pretty much caught him in a lie, but in order to save his friend since i promised i said that he had shown me something on his phone and I accidentally saw the conversation. Now my bf has been "out of it" as he puts it, this whole week because he says he feels weird about sunday, like he cant believe i did that and looked thru his friends phone, etc etc and hes trying to make me feel guilty. Am I wrong here? And what can I say to him to make him realize hes the one that messed up without giving away the fact that his friend showed me their conversation?

Yall are going to argue and disagree on ALOT. So get used to it.. even though you can't stop thinking about it.. you have to pick your battles. Yea, you want him to know he messed up and that your not a fool. But atleast now he knows that you aren't stupid and no matter what he does, you'll find out.
He probably just deleted it because either he felt bad about the stuff he said, and wanted to avoid a fight.. or because he was mad and wanted to make you mad. He never thought that his friend would show you or he wouldn't have deleted it.
I say just drop it.. he was mad. WE all say things we don't mean when we are mad.. I would just let it go.. and NOT throw it in his face ever again.. eliminate the shit before it ever even starts.. you'll be alot happier.. i promise (:

I wouldn't STOP looking thru his phone and everything.. if that's what works for yall.. then good.
You can't put your all into someone, even if you know they are your soulmate.. you gotta watch your back.. cause people change with the blink of an eye..

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(Rating: 5) so true. you CANNOT put your all into someone! thank you!
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