Member Since: March 7, 2010
Answers: 69
Last Update: April 17, 2010
Visitors: 4653
|
| |
|
so my boyfriend and i have this agreement that when we go out and party we tell each other first and then call each other when we get back to just say a quick goodnight and to make sure we got back fine because we live far apart. He has been going out a lot lately and i haven't. And he keeps not holding his end up but it really hurts me because i expect it and then it doesn't happen. We have been through it and i threatened to break up with him over it before. I don't want to end our 2 year relationship over something this stupid because i know he hasn't cheated or done anything deliberately to hurt me. He gets home and passes out. Meanwhile, I wake up and then cry myself to sleep. I know, pathetic right? Anyway it causes a lot of emotional pain and i don't know what to do. If he can't keep up his end it feels like he just doen't care at all about how i feel. (link)
|
a male perspective: yes you are psycho.
just kidding, smile. Seriously though, if you want him to resent you and make him feel nagged and that you don't trust him, you are doing exactly the right things. Needy and clinging are two of the most unattractive characteristics in a significant other. If you have to watchdog your boyfriend, is the relationship on shaky ground in the first place or are you just insecure?
Know the best way to get people to not do something? Tell them they have to do it. It is quite possible if you were to tell him that he need not call anymore, he might actually begin to do it because then it will be his idea and/or he wants to show you he cares.
Either you trust him or you don't. A phone call is not going to stop him from cheating if that is what you are worried about. A webcam in his dorm room might make you feel better so you can see him home safe, but being constantly monitored is not healthy for a relationship. And be honest with yourself, you are not worried about him being safe, you are worried about what he is doing.
Mature relationships allow each partner personal space with a foundation of trust.
|
|
Rating: 4
| |
im not really worried about him or me.. i more just want him to wanna talk to me. and i know its selfish but maybe i want to be the last person he talks to that night. and hey, he goes out, but i deserve a 60 second phone call from the whole night just to know he cares enough about my feelings. he wont cheat on me im pretty confident about that one. but i cant say i dont get at all jealous everyone else gets way more time with him than i do.
|
|