Q: Hello, well I've been having a recurrent dream, not so much the same dream but the same subject. I have a boyfriend, I'm happy we have been together for one year. We are engaged to get married in a couple years, so it's pretty serious. Before him I had trouble relationships, but there was one relationship that I have to admit left me scarred. My first boyfriend. Him and I loved eachother very much while we were dating. My parents didnt want us together, especially my mother, he even cried to her. We did not have a very long relationship because we had an issue that forced me to break up with him.(Not cheating issue just another) But our connection did not end after that, It took me a while to move on and have another relationship, after him I believed I tried dating like three other guys but somehow it would not work out and instead of mourning the loss of them I would find a way to always go back with my first boyfriend. He changed completely after we broke up 360, he became a jerk to me and since he knew i liked him he took advantage of me, he would make me break up with new boyfriend and then act hard to get. He did ask me to go back with him about six time, but somehow to me it did not seem right so I always turned him down, that always made him very mad.
Finally about four years later, I find one guy that is perfect (my current boyfriend). My first boyfriend even tried breaking us up after two months and I told him no.Which was a first to me because I would always do that, Once I did that I finally thought that I had some closure. We have now been together for over a year and I do love him very much and every thing between us is serious. But sometimes I catch myself thinking about my first boyfriend, it makes me mad and fustrated that I would even have thoughts about him.But yesturday I had a dream about him visiting me, and that I let him talk to me and kiss me and while it made me fustrated it would just happen, and I would tell him I miss him and he missed him. But when I was droping him off somewhere I told him " I can't believe I just cheated on my boyfriend" and he said " What are you going to do?" and I told him to leave. Then while he was leaving he told me " five years". I don't why he said five years, we have just been breakin up since three years. I am fustrated on what to do, I dont want to loose my current boyfriend over this issue, I don't know if to tell him. I dont know what does my first boyfriend still represent to me and I need someone to talk to. Please Help, sorry if it's kind of long lol.

Rating: 5

bio

Info