15/f
I dont know if anyone can answer this. I just dont understand why even though when I hang out with my friends I have a good time and laugh, but when I get home I still go into a depression. I start playing really sad songs and I try to cut myself and I just start bawling and freaking out.
My best friend, who I love more than anything in a friendship kind of way, just moved away about 3 weeks ago. Then the boy I was seeing decided to abruptly end our relationship for no good reason. Ever since then I've been feeling so lonely, like there's no one around I can talk to or relate to and I feel abandoned. Then I always feel guilty cause of done many things Im not proud of (drinking mostly) but its constant and i always feel like my dad can see me and is so disappointed in me (he died when I was three.) No matter how bad i feel though i cant stop drinking and no matter how sick it makes me feel.
I dont really know how this can be answered, but does anyone feel what Im going through? I just dont understand cause, really not to sound conceited, ive been told im very pretty and my mom makes a pretty good salary and when i think of how much worse some people have it i feel selfish for wanting to end my life sometimes but i cant help it i still feel like everything is just going so wrong.
Please help. Im sorry this is so long.
Dude the last thing you want to do is cut yourself. Seriously, yeah.. I'm a stranger, and I doonntt know you but cutting doesn't get rid of stress. Think about it, you're leaving scars just to remember . Take a deep breath, relax. Yeah life is hard but shit, when isn't it? Maybe your drinking triggers it, that you need something to help yourself not feel so "lonley" . Its never EVER bad to go ask for some help. You're not alone, and it happens to a whoolle lot of ppeoplle ! Why are you going to feel bad? We all make mistakes, it shouldnt put you through depression. Were teenagers, we have a whole lot more to go/do with life. Just bare through and make the best of it, and things will get soo much better. School is almost coming up ( as much as i hate saying it ) but theres a PERFECT chance to meet new friends and to feel like you can share our feelings with. ha, and guys are just assholes.. lmao. sorry for any guy who is reading this. But seriously? They change their minds every freekin' 4 minutes. yeah yeah, you're probably reading this and going " alright.. nnneeextt "; but ... take it as advise. Honestly, it'll do you some good . Now cheer up, and how about we have some fun in our summer eh? ;]
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(Rating: 5)
haha i didnt think "nneexxt" this actually helped and i laughed a bit at the end. thank you!
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