about

Hi I'm Lily; 15 year-old Amercian girl. My friends have called me a fortune cookie...I don't know why ;) . I love to help, inbox me, if you like to. I specialize in Relationship & Friendship. I love my best friend Seth, I couldn't ask for a better friend (and hopefully one day boyfriend). He's quite the inspiration for me, I couldn't thank him enough for everything he's done for me. So I decided to help other likes he's helped me.
-Lily

advice

So, i went out with Ryan for 6 months. We broke up last month, the day after our 6 month on the 25th :/.
A while back, in the beginning of our relationship.. he cheated on me with a girl. Well, this girl lives pretty far.. about 500 miles away. She comes down here sometimes with her friend. So, she was down one weekend and i decided to hang out with her. I have been talking to her for a long time, just trying to keep peace with her. Supposeably Ryan knew i was hanging out with her and got mad, well.. if i want to get to know the girl and just keep peace with her.. and talk to her about what really happened.. im allowed to as Ryans girlfriend..right?
Well, he got reallyreally mad and broke up with me because "he was no longer happy"... i dont understand?

we were takling on sunday, and this is what i said to him...

Me-
i have been thinking about our 6 months together.. i thought about how we both made some mistakes, but you made the bigger ones. I gave you about 2 chances.. like after you cheated on me and broke up with me in january. After those happened, i took you back after consideration.. i screw one thing up, (a pretty big thing, but not AS big as the things you did) and you break up with me.. i dunno... i just have been thinking about that lately.. almost all break. i know i lied to you about what i was doing, but not necessarily, i left her out of the plans because i was not 100% sure if it was gunna actually happen till we got to her house. i know i was talking to her but anthony kept changing his mind and everything.. but thats not what this is about. its about how i gave you alot of chances, and i do something wrong and you just end it. you dont consider giving me another chance.. idunno. i just was thinking about that, i thought you should know what was on my mind.

Ryan-
well i knew ud bring this up eventually
and i havnt figured out a way to tell you this...i tried but i guess you didnt see it how i was trying to say it
i didnt break up with you because of some unforgivable mistake
i didnt break up with you out of anger.
but after that happened. nothing felt right. and i still dont know why
i wasnt happy
and i dont know why
i couldnt stay in a relationship that i wasnt hhappy in .
and i couldnt pretend to be happy when i wasnt. i just couldnt. not around you
this isnt about forgiving you. ive already done that. it wasnt that big of a deal what happened. i mean you lied but w.e i got past it
its just i wasnt happy
laura i wasnt happy wen i went to bed everynight. and i wasnt happy wen i woke up
id have nightmares every single night. EVERY NIGHT
somenights id wake up crying .or sweating. or out of breath

i just love this kid soo much. i dont know what to do...
i got in a fake facebook open relationship. he texted me at 1 am "YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF, fuckin goin out with brandon. u have some fucking nerve" i texted him back like.. ry its fake.. and he was like "this is so redicilous i cant believe u would ever do that."

ever since he snapped on me.. (that was sunday night/monday morning).. i didnt talk to him. it is now wednesday and today he tried to pull me out of my 8th period class.. and i saw him. my mouth dropped. i was like WHAT THE HELL. i didnt leave my class. i learned to have some dicipline for myself.
and he doesnt understand why i cant be friends iwth him, its hard to be in love and friends with someone. its terrible.

Lately, i havent been thinking much of it. but, i know deep down i am not over this and i really need to get back with him. after everything that has happened, i still love him. and i need him. he keeps telling me taht he loves me. i dont know what to do! im in such a messy situation. i just need help. i need something that i can say to him, that will get him back maybe? i dont konw. i just want him back. i want him to come chasing for me. i want to be in his arms. i want to kiss him. i miss him so much:/

the other day. i was at my friends house. we were talking and in mid sentance it came out "i miss ryan.." i almost went hysterical. it was the first time i admitted to it.
i hung out with him thursday night. i snuck out and slept over his house. we had sex. it felt like the good old times. im just so DESPERATE for him! i need him!!!!

if you guys can feel my pain.. i dont nkow. but i hope you do. maybe someone with experiance with something like that will help?

btw ever since we broke up he hasnt been the same, hes been getting drunk with other girls.. and he isnt a drinker and driver. he did. i screamed at him. i lost all respect for him after that. i couldnt believe he drove drunk after HIS FRIEND died from it! the guy he used to be would say "nah, sorry i gotta drive"... i dont know what is going on with him. he isnt the same person anymore.

Wow-that was long! But descriptive. Did you have sex with Ryan? Before or After?～anyway sounds like you got your-self a Fairytale!^^ Just my suspiction ,but sounds like love. TALK TO HIM! Get your courage up tell him how you feel/think about all that. Goood luck! -lily

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(Rating: 4) i did talk to him :/ and he just says he wasnt happy and hes sorry.
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