I have a B.A. with a double major in Sociology and Psychology. I have a B.ED in education. I have a diploma for a two year university Freelance Writer course. I have 5 grown children (4 boys, 1 girl) and 5 grandchildren (4 boys, 1 girl). I love to paint, read and write.
I am a humanitarian and love to help people.
I am a very positive woman and I enjoy life.
I truly believe that "more positive you are, more you attract good things in life".
I believe everything happens for a reason (even if the reason is unclear).
I believe that if you surround yourself with positive, uplifting people, the better your life will be.
Gender: Female
Occupation: retired teacher
Age: 49
Member Since: February 1, 2009
Answers: 29
Last Update: February 24, 2009
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karenR
just_ask_me
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I have a 17-year old daughter who is currently a senior in high school. All her life, she has never had a boyfriend or even a friend that is a boy. This specifically is not why I am writing, because she is free to be friends with whom she wants. However, she has confided in me that she is afraid of men and boys and has been her whole life. I am not sure if it is getting worse as she gets older or is just manifesting itself in different ways. I was never like this so I am not sure what would be considered 'normal' feelings for her to have. I have talked to a few close friends about this and they say that I should look into her past to see if anyone could have hurt her in any way. I can think of nothing, except for things that I don't think would still have much of an effect on her now, although maybe you think different (if so, please tell me). What I am thinking of happened during preschool. There was a group of boys that used to chase her and scare her all the time at recess. She was very afraid and for this reason she spent time hiding from boys and staying physically very close to her female friends. When she got older she always feared them. Although she is a shy person, it isn't a fear of rejection. She is afraid that they will do something to her to harm her. She can't even watch the news because of all the rapes and things of that nature.
I just don't know what to do or how to make it better. I would just like to find out what happened to make her this way and how to help her get past her fears. I appreciate any input you can provide. (link)
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I seriously believe you should seek counselling for your daughter. Maybe something happened in her past you don't know about and she can't speak to you about it. If it is those incidents when she was in pre-school, then she was never given the necessary tools to deal with it and needs a bit of help overcoming it. There is absolutely nothing wrong or shameful about seeking advice from a professional source. She is 17 and should be out having fun with both boys and girls. This fright she has about boys and men has become an obssession to her. Please for her sake, get professional help for your daughter.
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