Q: i don't think i think like a normal teenager does, like i act like a normal one, but in my head i'm not really. like i worry about everything and i'm not carefree and i don't just care about having fun like a normal teenager. this seems like it wuoldn't be a bad thing, to have like a more mature mind, but i don't want to think like that. my sister is just a carefree teenager who all she cares about is having fun, smoking,drinking, partying,getting with guys,the way she looks, and her friends and family, but like she still gets good grades too. she never thinks of anything bad that could come in the future, except college, like she can't talk about death or getting attacked or what age she thinks she's gunna die, when she'll get married and if it'll work, etc. or she gets all worried. all she wants to talk/think about is like boys and everything that i listed above. i wish i could think like that, but instead i think of all of the bad thhings that have happened in the world, the future (like my adulthood), older times like the 60's 70's and 80's because i liked those times better, and fate, etc. it makes me kind of sad and worried/nervous all of the time, and i'm not carefree like other teenagers. i think the reason i am like this might be because most of my friends have depression or other types of problems, like cutting, etc. but we're all pretty normal. i ACT like a normal teenager, like drinking,partying,dancing,friends,but i don't worry about boys because i hate the way i look because i have braces and i'm very very inconfident and have never kissed a boy and none of my friends are even virgins. but i don't think like a normal one. when i party, i just think about all of the bad things instead of just having fun, like what if i pass out or throw up and my parents have to come pick me up, what if i get caught, what if i go upstairs into my friends room and a guy is up there and tries to attack me, what if this guy starts touching me without permission, what if someone thinks i'm a slut, etc, and some of you might say it's resp0onsible to always be cautious and sometimes its a good thing that i'm very cautious, but other times the thigns that i'm thinking are just ridiculous and unnecessary because no one is trying to do anything bad, everyones just trying to have fun. so please don't answer the question saying that im actually responsible because i go way over the top inside my head with the cautiousness. i so badly want to be a happygoluck teenager who lives to have fun but still does good in school, but is carefree about anything in life except have fun, besides the major things like taking care of myself, school, family, etc. i'm not saying like dumb ignorant and ditzy, i'm saying like i don't want to worry that much just live in the moment. because i can NEVER live in the moment, i'm always living in either the past or future. also, even though everyone does it in highschool, and i KNOW they do so please don't try to answer saying they don't, whenever i drink i feel guilty and like im' diong something wrong because my parents don't know,but seriously like do they really expect me and my friends not t drink when i KNOW that they did when they are my age? but like at parties after everyone gets drunk and some people start fighting or hooking up with random people or throwing up or peeing, i'm like, how is this even fun anymore? and i just feel bad, like omg what if my parents saw m e right now what would they think? and i hate it so much, like for once i want to actually have fun instead of worrying about if it's normal for everyone to be drinking so much. and like in my head i KNOW its normal, because like its highschool, so how can i stop worrying about what i'm doing and just enjoy the time i'm in? so my question is how can i become more like that and not think that everyone is out to get me and not worry so much about whats going to happen in life and just enjoy the time i'm at right now (highschool)?

Rating: 5

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