I am a father of three, girl, boy, girl, all are now over 18. I have been married for 29 years as of 6-30-07, so yes, if you do the math I was married at 18, just after graduating high school. I am very aware of the pit falls of doing so, but we made it through the really tough times. I came to this site, because of my daughter, she also uses the site.
I am an author and have written three books, only one under this name, but it is not how I make my living. I am in business, working full time and I have a seasonal business in ponds, selling Koi, goldfish, water plants and supplies. I help people to plan and build ponds, as well as, maintenance if they need it.
I am not here for the ratings and could careless what you rate me. I will tell you things I know, I will tell you what you don't want to hear, but most of all, I will tell you things from my perspective. I have experienced a lot in my life, I have not lived with my head in the sand and I'm a realist, you want someone to blow smoke up your as*, don't read my writings, (I don't do fairy tales).
I am not so foolish as to think I am always right, I can only tell you what I know and give you something to think about. It is up to you to find out if I'm right or not.
Life is complicated, because people are complicated and one answer does not necessarily fit all, but that doesn't mean you should not consider what I say as a possibility.
Feel free to write me personally if you wish, there is only so much you can say in such a restrictive environment as this site is, it doesn't allow for proper conversation.
Thank you for coming to my column and giving me the chance to help.
E-mail: gibber@cableone.net
Gender: Male
Location: Minnesota
Age: 53
Member Since: May 14, 2008
Answers: 285
Last Update: March 27, 2013
Visitors: 26981
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F/15
I'm going to be a sophomore this fall. I've had boyfriends before. A guy I sorrta like says I'm a scene kid. I disagree. That's him.
A good few people say I'm sooo pretty, absolutely amazing. I guess I'm straightedge? I don't even curse.
I have a friend. Neither of us have kissed a guy. Since we came into highschool she's changed soo much. It breaks my heart! A few close friends of mine warn me that she seems a little 'familiar'. She's trying too hard to be like me.
She just got a boyfriend over a week ago and only told me now.
So, If I'm so great, why can't I get a guy? I am pretty shy and don't like school activities, picky, and no one understands me [in a good way].
I have high selfesteem but not so much to come off as being cocky, if you know?
But I do get jealous of others easy.
I'm willing to out with a boy, kiss him, as long as he does first.
but..is it okay to be upset with my friend? She's pretending to be me and got a guy first. I find this so odd. Oh! NOWW Shes sorta 'cool'. Her boyfriend is quarterback of class clowns.
Hah, shes such a prep (link)
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Not only do you have a problem with jealousy, you have a problem with being too competitive. You have a friend that likes who you are so much that she mimics you. Now is the problem that she acts like you, or that she does it better then you?
At 15 you should not be so concerned about having a boy friend. Your life is going to be so much fun spending it playing follow the leader. You don't have an independent bone in your body and your going to go through your life reacting, instead of acting and actually doing something with your own.
Congarts, you actually got me feeling sorry for you, that's a real accomplishment, it happens so rarely.
Reply:
I feel sorry for you, because I knew that you would and probably never will see the truth. Wow, am I surprised; you can write your letter, but not see how it drips with competitiveness. There is a saying that goes "Impersonation is the sincerest form or flattery", yet all you can do is hate her for it and want to be "yourself", better then her, (I'm just not sure how that works exactly).
I'm not sure how she does you, better then you, but my guess would be, you don't know who you are very well. Instead of hating, why don't you try learning more about who you are, you might find that not only will the boys like you better, but maybe the girls will like you better too.
And for goodness sake, stop playing the victim, it gets old real fast.
Remember, you are precious and special in your own right, you don't need to compete.
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Rating: 2
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I DO have a problem with being competitive. My problem is that she acts like me and she acts like shes better than me. I dont want to be around her. Follow the leader is boring. I dont like that game ;]. And Im already aware that Ive got no backbone but I have a perrty darn good reason for it! And you feel sorry for me? Why should you?!
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