I am a father of three, girl, boy, girl, all are now over 18. I have been married for 29 years as of 6-30-07, so yes, if you do the math I was married at 18, just after graduating high school. I am very aware of the pit falls of doing so, but we made it through the really tough times. I came to this site, because of my daughter, she also uses the site.
I am an author and have written three books, only one under this name, but it is not how I make my living. I am in business, working full time and I have a seasonal business in ponds, selling Koi, goldfish, water plants and supplies. I help people to plan and build ponds, as well as, maintenance if they need it.
I am not here for the ratings and could careless what you rate me. I will tell you things I know, I will tell you what you don't want to hear, but most of all, I will tell you things from my perspective. I have experienced a lot in my life, I have not lived with my head in the sand and I'm a realist, you want someone to blow smoke up your as*, don't read my writings, (I don't do fairy tales).
I am not so foolish as to think I am always right, I can only tell you what I know and give you something to think about. It is up to you to find out if I'm right or not.
Life is complicated, because people are complicated and one answer does not necessarily fit all, but that doesn't mean you should not consider what I say as a possibility.
Feel free to write me personally if you wish, there is only so much you can say in such a restrictive environment as this site is, it doesn't allow for proper conversation.
Thank you for coming to my column and giving me the chance to help.
E-mail: gibber@cableone.net
Gender: Male
Location: Minnesota
Age: 53
Member Since: May 14, 2008
Answers: 285
Last Update: March 27, 2013
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I need an honest viewpoint on this.
Lets say you're a 16 year old girl and you broke up with your 16 year old boyfriend (which is my case). You broke up with him because he's been giving you really obvious hints that he didn't wanna be together anymore. He even said so one time. After a week of breaking up, he sends you a text saying something like: "You're contagious because I cried for no reason last night"
and all of a sudden, you start seeing your ex boyfriend depressed. (he never was before...in fact, he was happy). He tries to flirt with you more... He doesn't eat at lunch...he feels really sad and crappy. He doesnt flirt with girls like he usually did to try and make you jealous. He just sits in your table at lunch and sulks.
If this was your case, do you think he's depressed over the break up?
Thank you (link)
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The only thing I would add to what has already been said is, these are also the symptoms of mourning. People associate mourning with death, but we mourn for loss, not death. Be a friend, help him explore what this is, if it is mourning, he will work through it. It is not a reason for you two to become an item again. If it works out in the end that you get together again, you will both be stronger for it.
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