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I am a man in my 20s. I've had this female friend since I started college, and she's one of the best friends I could ever ask for.

Thing is, I have had a crush on her since she and I met. Now, the attraction never changed, but I know that she will not see me as anything more than a friend. In fact, she's maintained friendships with people who were attracted to her, because as she says, "Why should she let that change the friendship?"

The thing is, I don't know how to tell her. I'm afraid that I'll be the exception to her rule. And I know she and I will not be together like that, but I want to be honest with my friend.

Help me be honest without losing my friend. I know it already seems like she would accept me anyway, but still, I'm afraid.

They say,"Honesty is the best policy." Your female-friend sounds like a very considerate and very friendly person. She sounds like she's down to earth, and very easy to get along with.

You said that in the past she had male friends who were attracted to her, but that it did not deter her from friendship with them. I wonder if, perhaps she told you this information because she had a slight inkling that you, as well, have a 'crush' on her?

Wether she knows or not, I believe your best course of action would be to tell her the truth. Leaving feelings build up inside of you, unresolved, can be quite a burden. And it sounds like it's a burden you've been walking around with for quite some time.

When you're alone with her, and can talk intimately, I would suggest saying,"I have something I want to admit to you. I don't want it to effect our friendship, but..." and then carry on with exactly what you told us. That ever since you met her you've liked her. That you've been scared to tell her because you were afraid you'd loose her friendship. And then ask her if she might possibly feel that the two of you could become more than friends, or if she only values your friendship and wouldn't want anything more from you.

Like I said, she does sound like a very nurturing and friendly girl, so I highly doubt she'd become appalled and throw water in your face, or cause any kind of dramatics over the information. I know, it will be extremely scarey to relay your feelings to her, and your mind will always worry about the "what if's"(what if she hates me? what if she doesn't want to be friends anymore? what if...) but you cannot let that get in the way of unburdening yourself with this secret and getting on with your life.

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(Rating: 5) Thank you. I think I needed someone to just push me out the door.
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