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Me and my boyfriend have been together for alomost a year & a half. We are (were) supposed to get married next month. Last night we were talking and he told me something that he had been holding in since last summer that he wanted to get off his chest. I was pregnant last summer and miscarried, he told me he doesnt believe I was ever pregnant. This has hurt me so much, we are not little kids, in fact I am older than him (21 & 23) I would not make up such a horrible story, I was crushed when it happened and still cry at night sometimes when I think about it. He says he cant marry me till he has proof. Getting "proof" isnt a problem, but i feel now as though I cant marry him becuase he doesnt trust me and Ive always been told if you dont have trrust you dont have nothin. I Love him more than I could ever say and the thought of losing him upsets me to no end, but at that same time i feel so betrayed by him like im some kind of monster that would make up a story like that. What should I do? please help Ill rate!!
You're right, without trust you have nothing to base a marriage on. It would be one thing if he had expressed his doubt and asked you whether or not you lied in the past and believed your answer when you you told him you didn't lie. It's a completely different issue when he doesn't believe you are being honest with him now and demands proof. If you give him his proof, he doesn't have to trust you because you've provided evidence. He might claim that once he sees you aren't lying he will trust you but I don't think he really will. That's like asking him to submit to a lie detector test and then telling him that if he passes, you will trust him. Trust isn't something that can be gained through evidence and proof, it's gained by really knowing someone well enough to know their heart and their character. He may have some trust issues and this may just be who he is. I don't think this will be the last time he questions your honesty and you deserve to be with someone who believes in you as much as you believe in them. He probably does love you but he really just may not be capable of complete trust and you need to decide if that's something you want to live with for the rest of your life.
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(Rating: 5)
Thank you so much, I guess I already knew the answer, I just needed someone to tell it to me too.
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