I'll give advice to anyone I think I can help in any way. Ask away.
Gender: Female
Location: England
Occupation: Student/ General Know-It-All
Age: 22
Member Since: August 17, 2005
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Last Update: January 22, 2011
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I'm starting to like one my best friends... and likewise. We cuddle a lot and everything, but we've never done anything more ; not even kiss. He's not affectionate at all, and we talked about this. He said it's because whenever he shows affection, he always ends up getting treated like shit, and whenever he tells people secrets, they use them against him. This leads to the problem where... it's impossible for him to be serious. He's the worlds biggest goofball. He said he's like that because it's just easier when everyone thinks you're kidding... nobody can embarrass you ; nobody can make an idiot out of you. He hates how he is... and so do I. What can I do to help?
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He's got a point but never trusting or opening up to anyone is a pretty crappy way to live. All you can do is be there for him, encourage him to talk about himself and over time prove to him that you are a) not going anywhere and b) not going to betray him.
Hopefully he'll realise this and start to trust you with more and more things. And once he's managed to trust one person it's pretty likely he'll blossom and his confidence will go way up (that's what I've found anyway). And likewise, start telling him things you maybe wouldn't tell many people (if you trust him). By making yourself a little vulnerable, you're showing him you don't have an ulterior motive.
The biggest thing you can do is just not be like the other people he's encountered in his life. It'll mean the world to him.
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Rating: 5
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Thank you so much... I really appreciate your response.
...and your username rules, by the way.
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