about

Well, most importantly, my name is Matt. If there's anything else you want / need / care to know then feel free to ask.

advice

As indicated by the subject of this question, this is another one of those 'omg am i in love? or is it lust? or is it... something my mind made up to mock me?" type questions. So please bear with me. this is going to be a LONG question or series of questions. If you don't believe me go ahead and scroll down and look.

My first question would be to the guys: Do you guys enjoy flirting with a girl before making any type of move? It seems to me that guys find it fun to seem interested in a girl then totally shoot her down. Or something to that effect. Do guys believe in real honest-to-goodness true love? Or do you guys just see flings [right word?] as the right thing and see how many girlfriends you can get and then dump before you graduate high school/college? Right now, I would to state that no, I am not biased in seeing guys as heart-breakers and have no feelings. I'm just wondering, since I have no idea what a guy's notion of flirting is. Do guys believe in love at first sight or true love? Or is it that the only love left in this world is more similar to lust? Do you guys have high standards in what you expect in the 'perfect' girl?

Girls. Do any of you girls find yourselves falling in love with every single guy that comes along and makes an impact or small dent in your life? Do you find yourself daydreaming about the cute guy you've never talked to before or one of your new guy friends falling in love with you? Do you believe that out there, somewhere, there is a perfect guy? Do you believe that you'll meet him before you graduate high school or after? before you graduate college or after? I'm the type of person who wants a soul mate before graduating high school. High standard but what can I say? Almost every girl dreams of finding the perfect one before too long. Is it wrong to have too many high standards for what you want in a guy?

Now this section is to either gender. How do you know if you're truly 'in love' and not lusting? People probably have asked this question many times before, but I'm still curious. I've fallen in and out of love faster than you can say "omgimthinkimlove~". I can't really trust my feelings so saying things like "just trust your heart" does not bode well with me. What's the difference between love and lust as in how do you know when you feeling lust instead of love? Can you trust yourself to truly to be 'heads over heels' in love? Can your deep feelings of love be a fabrication of your mind when it senses that you're really lonely? Define true love, give me how you feel when you believe you're truly in love.

Anyone who bothers to read this entire question passage and cares to think deeply about the questions i've asked and answers thoughtfully would definitely get a 5. I would be really surprised if more than three people answer more than three questions or bother to answer at all. Answer more than two questions at least please. If you read this far, congratulations you get a virtual cookie and probably a 5 if you answer all the above questions [depending on if you're a girl or guy] or more than three. Idiots who have no idea what they're saying and are trying to sound philosophical will have a 1 branded on their foreheads or something.

Being a guy, I'm just going to answer what I can.

First, I want to say that boys DO enjoy flirting with girls, but I'm pretty sure that girls like to flirt with us as well. In most cases, we DON'T want to lead anyone on, unless it's the person we like.

I don't think it would be right for me to answer the other questions about what we want in a girl, because it's different for everyone. I think, basically, we just want somebody we feel comfortable around and that we can tell anything to.

Personally, I believe in true love. I don't believe in love at first sight at all. While physical attraction is initially important, it's personalities that grow on you and can play a much bigger role.

I think the difference between love and lusting would be what you want out of the relationship. If you want it to go somewhere and care very little about the physical aspect of it, then I think it could be close to love. You need to ask yourself what you would give up for them. Or what future you think you could have together.

I hope this helped. If you have any more questions, just ask.

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(Rating: 5) wow. I feel so special that my question was the first one in your advice column, so i shall give you your first 5 too!! [and a virtual cookie] :) Your answer has given me a better perspective of a guy's point-of-view. If you have AIM, IM me some time, I think i might have some more questions [scary huh?]. greyunseen.
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