First of all, you're only 14, and to be honest, I don't think your relationship is serious enough to be even considering sex -- oral or otherwise. You're so young, and you could easily be making a mistake that you'll regret for the rest of your life.

That being said, oral sex isn't about who's first and second -- whatever happens, happens. You're not going to listen to me saying "don't do it." So my advice is to just go with the flow when it comes to who's first or at the same time or whatever.

As far as protection goes, a condom is a VERY good thing to have, even just for oral sex. Yeah, it's a little weird, but you can get STDs from giving oral sex. Same goes for him -- even if you're a virgin, he should use a dental dam when he's giving you oral sex. If you can't get ahold of an actual dental dam, then just use a square of plastic wrap about the size of your open hand -- stick that over your "area" before he begins oral. It'll keep both of you safe (again, you can get an STD from him giving YOU oral too).

Of course it's cool to call a guy first; this is the 21st century. Is he in any classes with you? If he is, then you can make the call really casual by saying something like, "Hey, I kinda spaced out during (insert class here) and didn't write down the homework; can you tell me what the assignment is?"

Well, my ex-boyfriend has his lip pierced, and I asked him about this. He says that his piercing doesn't get in the way of kissing, and that he could feel the difference at first, but then he just got used to it.

As far as being on the other end, it doesn't feel weird to kiss someone with a lip piercing. It's different at first, but just like he said -- you get used to it.

I can understand why your mom might be a little wary of putting you on birth control. But I think that the Pill (or the patch, or whatever) could be a good idea for you, especially if it was recommended by your doctor. And obviously if your doctor thinks it's a good idea, she'll talk to your mom about that and (hopefully) convince her that it's good for you.

I went on birth control mainly because I was sexually active, but with the bonus effect of regulating my period. It took about 2 cycles -- not only did it regulate my period, but it also made it shorter, lighter, and got rid of my cramps completely. It was really good for me. However, I went off birth control about 6 months ago (after being on for a year), and since then my period has become irregular again. So if it's something you want to do, you should talk to your doctor and make sure that if/when you do go on BC, it's not going to screw up your period again if you go off it.

Hey there. I'm Holly, and I'm 19. I've been through a lot in my life -- literally, if you can name it, I've probably dealt with it or know someone who has. Unfortunately, it sucks, but fortunately, it puts me in a great position to help people that need advice. Feel free to ask me anything about anything. =]

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