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My Future
My dad wants me to be a doctor but I want to become something else (engineer). And I don't know how to make him see that
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The real question for me is why does he want you to become a doctor. Asking him, may give you a clue as to what to have a talk with him about. ofcourse you should do what you want to do. So if he believes you should be a doctor because it is high earning, there are other jobs that make a good living too. If he himsself is a doctor and wants you to follow in his profession, he needs to realize that will only happen if you want to be a doctor or even a nurse. Such a job comes with a lot of stress too, more so than other jobs. If e has no real reason other than he wishes he had become a doctor and that dream of his never happened, then he may not realize that he is hoping to live his dream through you, vicariously, you know, like reality TV. Each person must live their own life, make their own mistakes, and learn from them, do what is most important to improve themselves. Everyone has been given a will to choose, heck even the Bible says that. So instead of simply doing what you are told to do, even though you are an adult as of age 18, you would be allowing yourself to be forced to not live your life by your own choices. It is not a matter of disrespect for your parents, not honoring them, it is more a matter of parents using what they believe is their authority to make you do something you do not wish to do. They can only use this tactic if you willingly give your authority over to them. When told no, parents have pleaded, begged, or threatened, even tried making deals wit their child. I have read of adult kids who say they can't afford college but parents said they will pay it all if the child goes to the college of their choice or studies for the vocation they want the child to follow. Thats nasty, but it happens. So even though they are adults, and you say no, they may throw a fit like a child and grab at anything they think may torment you into giving in, like saying they'll never speak to you again or you are no longer a part of the family or other such threats. Just be firm, take your own path, but don't burn bridges....meaning be willing to see them and try on occasion to see them, invite them to whatever, send them cards and don't sit around waiting for them to come to their senses. My own Mom stopped talking to me when I was first married. We worked in the same building and a woman in my department who was around my Moms age, saw what was happening and offered to be an older woman in my life I could turn to if I needed until my Mom came to her senses which she eventually did, 6 months later, after imagining in her own mind that I was not happy for her that she was getting remarried. Parents can sometimes lose it be become misguided and then go on to a full tantrum. Somehow you will have to have a talk with him. If you are living at home, first arrange with contacts you know to have a place to stay in case the parents kick you out. This has happened before in letters I have read.
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Both are honorable fields and both can pay very well. So now it becomes what do you want to spend your working life doing - which will you enjoy doing, fulfill you and make you feel a contributor to humanity.
This is the conversation that you need to have with your father. Whether HE is happy with his own work role or is simply paying the bills, he will want the best for his child and their happiness. (OR, he should) A heart-to-heart with him letting him know that you are naturally inclined toward engineering and that is where your interest lies is needed.
*I* would rather make $150,000 at a job that I enjoy than $200,000 at a job that is drudgery and I hate.
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To pursue engineering, you can get into the field with an Associate's degree (2 years), but will need a minimum of 4 years to be an actual engineer.
You're looking at 10-14 years to become a medical doctor and when you do it's not a 9-5 job.
4 Year undergrad
4 year medical school
3-7 years ERAS residency
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Best of luck, I hope it works out as you hope!
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