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Is it weird that my roommate and I share a bed?


Question Posted Tuesday June 6 2023, 6:08 pm

My roommate (f/20) and I (f/20) moved out of the dorms late last year and into an apartment. Because rent around here is really steep, we were only able to afford a one-bedroom apartment. We initially planned to get a couple of twin beds for our shared bedroom but, in the interest of saving more money, we decided to get one queen bed, which we both share.

At first, we worried this might be a mistake, but it's actually worked out really well. Every night, it seems like we lie in bed chatting about anything and everything for at least a half-hour before finally drifting off to sleep. It's kind of like being a kid again and getting to have a sleep over every night. Plus, knowing we're gonna be sharing a bed at night encourages us to settle any disagreements we may have during the day when they occur. Because of these two factors, I feel this arrangement has helped strengthen our friendship.

Of course, our friends (not to mention my parents) think it's weird that we do this, since we aren't gay. I don't know, maybe it is a little weird. What do you think? Is this weird? And even if it is, should it matter, given how well it's worked out?


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CynanMachae answered Monday July 17 2023, 1:14 pm:
I think that it's nice that you have such a good relationship with someone who you are so obviously comfortable with.

You've apparently found comfort and joy with this other person, and her with you. That is something to be cherished and protected.

When we're younger it's hard to not look to the opinions of others and maybe even societal "norms."

As time goes by you learn that you do what works for you regardless of what others might think. because, who CARES what others might think.

I wish you all the best.

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Dragonflymagic answered Wednesday June 7 2023, 10:33 pm:
Considering your age bracket, My first thought was that the two of you are being very wise and mature as you look at all sides of this arrangement, especially financially. Plenty of folks your age still do not think of future consequences with money and not made the best financial decision and bought two beds. I know how hard acceptence and teaching about LGBTQ is out there.My kids are the generation just before yours and the teaching was subtle but allowances were just being made. In some situations, I think the teaching of sexual preferences has actually confused young people and many are now thinking they prefer same sex when I know it can't be as prevalent as it currently is. It seems you both have some backbone and also plenty of self confidence whether you feel it or not. It seems most peoples minds have been flooded with so much info on alternative sexual preferences that what should be normal is now being suspected of being gay. Being gay seems to be the new in thing in some ways. I have heard from some straight females who are afraid of starting a friendship with another female for fear of others thinking they are gay. Sharing a bed for expense sake does not make someone gay or Les.
So do what you feel is right. Don't let it get to you. Right, I say that as I dislike the new terms getting rid of the words male and female and called instead, a person with a vagina. I am happy to hear how well its worked for you and all the benefits to it. I also feel that time in bed just before you fall asleep is a time when we slow down and relax and its easier to talk to someone about our day, so romantic couples have that same opportunity. My hubby and I do talk lots some nights and less on others but we always talk cus we are best friends as well as lovers. I know its harder to ignore when it is family. But just have patience dear. You both are learning how to adapt in a world that is getting too expensive for even single families to own a home, many are starting to share, two families renting a house together where both adults of each family are working but can't make it , and often there are children as well.

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