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I embarrassed myself in front of my crush today.
Now, there's this girl I've had a crush on for the past year and a half or so , and we're kind of casual friends but I was planning on asking her out. However, today, I did something that I think completely ruined my chances. I farted, in class. This may not sound like a major issue, however my farts are known for having a very strong odor. I tried my best holding it in, but it was a very big fart coming, and it just came out without me even attempting for it to come out. Nearly the entire class were all holding their noses, including my crush. To make matters worse, she even questioned me about it, whereas no-one else did (Well, this other guy did, but he's always complaining about things in general, and he hates me so I ignored him) Anyway, she said something along the lines of "Out of all the places to fart, why would you do it in class?" I was honestly too embarrassed to think of how to answer that question. Not embarrassed about the fart, but about the way everyone reacted to it. Now, this girl seems to be able to tolerate me most of the time, however when I fart, she seems to absolutely despise me. Most of the time, she's really nice as well, other than the occasional occurrences when I fart. What I wanted to say was "People can fart anywhere they want, it's a natural bodily function" but I thought that would sound rather rude and condescending plus I was still a little too embarrassed to speak, and this unfortunately led to me ignoring her, which was unintentional. I now fear that this "incident", if you wish to refer to it as such, may make her think I'm a rude person, when I am not. I may come across as a little bit harsh sometimes, but I'm never purposely rude, I just give my honest opinion. Now I shouldn't really be making this question seem like she's done everything wrong, considering it's not just her with a negative opinion of my farts. Heck, she didn't even have the worst reaction to it, but it's the fact that she questioned me about it that annoys me. Normally, if an issue like this arises, I'd try and sort it out the next day, but I can't do that, because today was the last day before Christmas break. Despite this incident, I still have feelings for her (and have had feelings for her for nearly 2 years)
I want her to be aware of my feelings for her before the new year, however we only see each other at school, and due to this incident, I fear that even if I ask her out after the new year, the farts will remain an issue. What I'm wondering is, should I tell her about my feelings via social media? I think it will be easier to handle, especially if I get rejected, considering that I'm quite shy and introverted most of the time, and also my goal since the beginning of this year was to ask her out by the end of the year, however I fear she may be a little creeped out if I ask her over social media. How can I still reach my goal despite this farting incident?
Thanks for reading my question!
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Since everyone knows you for having really stinky farts, lets address what is behind it first. I call tell you right now that depending on what I eat that is bad for my body type, I will have way stinkier farts than usual. Its not about farting but how bad it smells. Some have a sulfur smell and yeah its not pleasant but can be tolerated. Others can smell like the sewer, or like something dead or rotting and be so putrid you even gag at the smell of your own.
In Ayurvedic medicine which is one of the Eastern medicine beliefs, they break up people in 3 basic body types which you will need to know yours first before you can look up a list of diet for that body type. For example, I am a vata type. Certain things I am supposed to avoid, and if I don't, I get more gassy than usual or more stinky. One of those is chocolate and Since its the holiday season, I am partaking of more chocolate than usual so of course I am more stinky than usual. On worst case scenerio, before I began to avoid the things that could mess with my digestive system, I had the same problem many have, of explosive farts that can't be held back or explosive with small bits of diarrhea related only to what was eaten, not due to illness. There are diseases as well like Crohns and such than can develope if we don't eat a diet specific for our body type or perhaps also watching to eat less foods that are genetically modified or going for more that use organic ways to deal with pests. Its the pesticides that aren't talked about in media or by doctors but its worth checking to see if the amount of pesticides in your foods (worse in GMO foods than not) do affect you. Because if you stop for a while, and find your digestion better, then its best to stay away for good. Not everyone is affected so quickly or easily as others, and that is why it can't be said that it is bad for all people and why its still out there.
Heres a test:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Once you know is it is Vata, Pitta or Kapha, do a search for example 'What should Kapha's eat" and "What foods should Kapha's avoid".
This should help with the farts. All people still need to naturally have the passing of gas but it should be less frequent, less explosive and less horribly rottenly smelly.
Okay, on to asking the girl out. I can understand being embarrassed, even though its a normal human function, its just when its so extreme that it becomes embarrassing. I would recommend you waiting until you see how your body responds to watching what you take in food wise for the next two weeks. I say two weeks because that is what it took for me to heal from explosive farts or frequent ones. If you eat something you know produces smellier farts, this is remedied in a few days timed by avoiding the food that your body reacts to this way. For example, If I eat chocolate during the day, then in bed at night, I will be farting and its really stinky. But if I don't eat chocolate the next day at all, then by the following night or next morning of the next day, the smell is already no longer a problem. I think you need to get this under control first so its easier to have some self confidence in this area before approaching her or any other girl to date in case theres no chemistry between you two.
Once under control, all you need to get past is self doubting, fear of rejection, fear of saying or doing something wrong. Because I remember being socially anxious in school, I only had a few select friends but too shy with others. Never dated in HS. But I overcame that without any medications and it was actually simple so if you suspect its more social anxiety and fear of all people, compared to just fear of approaching a girl, then its either how to deal with that anxiety or clues on what to say or do if you approach a girl and get tongue tied or feel you said something stupid or dumb. There are quick tricks that help you to get past that awkward moment immediately and I can share that as well.
So at this point, I'd need to know from you whether you want to hear about one or the other or if both apply to you. Write to me from my column.
Sorry but the timing can't be what you have imagined in your mind to have a girlfriend or even one date on Holiday break or before the new year.
If I had a magic wand to wave, it could be immediate but this is something that you are going to have to work on as you can see. I've been in your spot and understand it well and am sure i can help if you will apply yourself and follow directions.
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