Member Since: December 11, 2012
Answers: 1
Last Update: December 11, 2012
Visitors: 635
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I am married woman having an affair with a married man. The guy happens to be a client at a company where I work. We always flirted with each other when he came to the office. I knew he was married from inception and vice versa. One day he came to the office and gave me his phone number and asked me to call him, when I did, he told me straight up what it was that he wanted. I thought he was rather bold, but admired the fact that he was so honest. The affair has been going on for one year now. Here is how my story goes. I have been married for approximately nine years, I was nothing but the perfect wife to my husband. I never even dreamed of cheating on him. I cooked, clean, and did everything to make him happy, but he was the type of husband who does not know how to give a woman what she wants. My husband was never affectionate, we only had sex when he wanted it, he doesn't like kissing and he doesn't like to be touched. I on the other hand am the total opposite. He never complimented me on anything, he only knew of negative criticism. We argued on a daily basis because everything I did or said was never good enough. So we would argue. What made me start the affair was when I decided enough was enough. I was tired of being the good wife, living to make everyone else but myself happy, and I think curiosity played a small factor as well. I decided to take the married guys proposition and I must agree that that was the best love making I ever experienced in my life. Our body chemistry was great. We complimented each other. He would constantly compliment me and he was just plain nice. He would take me out to lunch, something my husband has never done in 9 years of being married to him. He would always be there to listen to me when I was down or needed a shoulder to cry on and he just always made me feel special. He told me from the beginning that he had no intentions of leaving his wife and children and that they came first, I had no problem with this. I feel that if he was to leave his wife that our relationship would not be the same as it is now, I think I like it the way it is. Because I knew he was married I would always build up this wall in my mind only allowing myself to go so far with him because I didn't want to allow myself to fall in love with him, but I did. I sometimes felt guilty that I was cheating on my husband and decided to end the affair, I talked it over with my lover and although he didn't want me to quit the affair he decided to give me my space. But I would become miserable when I couldn't hear from him for a few days. I have fallen for him, but I have no intention of leaving my husband. I love them both, but I love my lover more. My lover and I eventually became distant for about a month and now had lunch together yesterday and he is telling me that he needs me, and that he belongs to me. His wife is now pregnant and I sometimes I wonder if he needs me only because he is not getting any from his wife. He told me that he has never cheated on his wife before, but there was just something about me from the day he met me that he knew he just had to persue. I like being with this guy, but I don't want to be used for my body. I asked him if he loves me and he said yes. He never talks about his wife when we are together. We always have great sex, but I know our relationship cannot go anywhere and I don't want to be a cheater forever, but my husband will not step up to the plate. I've already suggested counselling, he won't go. I go to bed in sexy lingerie, he falls asleep. I touch him, he pushes me away, what am I to do... Any suggestions... (link)
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your story is more or less the same as mine and well know one will tell you what to do, you are the only one who knows exactly what your heart want. With me, just some months after my marriage he started treating me differently and at that time i was pregnant with my second baby while my first son was just 2yrs. I didnt know anymore what was right or wrong, to him everything that i was doing was wrong, he didnt want to touch, kiss, sex, not even to talk about it, he was just a stranger even to his son. i though maybe it was because of the working distance. i tried different means of working in the same town as his but it couldnt help. later realised he was having an affair but he never had the guts to leave us and only to find out that the other lady was also pregnant same time as mine but she miscarred. the only thing that was supprising me was even though he was treating us like that, financial he continued doing his part and i will do mine.i reached a point were i didnt know what love is and that i will never give my love to any man. i asked him many times if he really loved us but he coudnt answer.i took the matter to both families but none encouraged me to leave. never had any intention to cheat but two years later i had an affair with an old friend who is also married, knew him for almost 10yrs but we were friends. it seems like it is working for me, i go to work with a smile and i taking care of my kids with a happy heart now than before, we are all glowing now. only God knows about tomorrow.
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