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so 17f
I masterbate, never had sex, but do watch porn. Is watching porn bad? I never really understood if it was or not. Sometimes I feel like I am betraying god, other times I say to myself I am not doing anything bad. opinions, anything please! (link)
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Watching porn is not a sin, hello mary magdelene was a prostitute. masterbation is healthy, people have been doing it for thousands of years.
People who think it is are brainwashed sheep. If you want to masterbate and watch porn, then do it. Live you're life how you want to.
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It's very confusing. I suppose I should backtrack. So, I was in the shower one day and, having a few gay friends, I wondered what it must be like for them - you know, coming out, persecution and what-not. Then I thought 'What would it be like if I were gay?', which filled my with this awful panic. Then I was fine for weeks until I saw a program on homosexuality, which reminded me of that panic in the shower. So I thought to myself, 'Well, if you got scared does that mean you're gay?' and from then on it's been on and off. Sometimes it really gets strong and at others it is non-existant.
So, I think - so what if I am? So I watch some gay porn, think about having sex with some traditionally good-looking guys; that kind of thing. However, when I do it honestly repulses me. I shudder. I mean, I find nothing about the male form sexually attractive - nothing - but for some reason this 'what if you are?' thought persists, despite me having a large appreciate of female beauty, being aroused by women and sexually repulsed by men.
I'm an open-minded guy with similar friends; if I was to come out as gay or bisexual or whatever then I know they're fully support me, as would my family. If they didn't I wouldn't care - I wouldn't pretend to be something I'm not to anyone. It's just this 'what if?' crap that seems to niggle at me. I wouldn't mind if I just knew if I was bi or gay or whatever but I KNOW I don't find men sexually attractive yet, for some reason, the thought niggles.
I'm also feeling very, very down for no reason lately. I generally feel depressed half the time, anyway, but that's, I believe, down by hypothyroidism and that I sometimes forget to take medication. That and my diet, which consists of junk food, especially moreso since I stopped exercising regularly. So, I'm wondering, in essence, whether this is just a result of depression of a genuine sexual indentity crisis?
Again, I'd like to stress that I wouldn't mind being gay or bi - sexual desire is not something I'd let define me - it's just the not knowing crap that annoys me.
Thank you for any advice given and I apologise for the length. (link)
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You're not gay, if you were sexually attracted to men you would know. I think you may have over analysed the whole situation and it has made you paranoid. If gay sex repulses you, then you're straight.
You have nothing to worry about and your diet wouldn't have made an impact on it at all. Maybe have some more salad and take a breather xox
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