about

Hey, everyone! My real name used to be Kristina, but I had it changed recently to...something much more complicated. I have 4 names now, 3 first names. I have been going by Bells, D, Ly (pronounced Lie), Strats, and Azariel recently. Lysistrata or Lysis work, too. If you prefer to be all proper, call me Belladonna. I'm really fine with anything you decide to call me. I'm California born, bred, and raised, but I'm 100% (or at least as close as you can get to 100%) Romanian. I look like a vampire, as most say, because of having very pale skin and dark brown hair. If there's anything else you want to know, e-mail me at chocoholic95624@aim.com. Feel free to add me to aim, yahoo, or msn! I know what it's like to need someone to talk to immediately. You would probably have more luck with my aim accounts, because I hardly ever go on msn or yahoo.

Here are a few SN's that I have.

WTF Whiskey
Martiniminion
DancingDaiquiri
SparklingSees
GoodnessGodiva
bloodlust1327
Nacho Face Love
peach and lime27
renastarr27
Vindicated Vodka
NeuroticNymph727
and
Chocoholic95624 (my primary)

So, if you would like to chat about anything, even if its random and you just need someone to talk to, please add me. =D


Ohkay. Well, I'm not sure if I should add anything more about myself, but I will anyways, just in case.

I have always been semi-depressed. At least. I started trying to kill myself when I was 9 years old, just after my mum sent me to a shrink for the first time, because I had threatened to hurt myself over 4 times in the past week.

I kept finding different ways to inflict self-torture, until year later, less than 3 years ago, I realized that I could not continue like that any longer.

A girl, she was like my own sister, even though she was so young, wrote a poem for me, which changed my outlook on life completely. As of that day, I have been talking through my depression.


"if you give me your hand
I'll support you when you fall
if you refuse to let me
baby, you'll just have to crawl
the bigger the dose
the lesser your life
the smaller the number
the better you'll fly
spread your wings and soar
all through the air
you can live without worries
live without a care
remember when we were little?
things were so perfect then
the biggest weight we had
was to remember how to count to ten
then it was a small number
right now it's huge
if you count it in
the number of pills you use
pills always seemed so useful
when in fact they're quite bad
the only thing they're doing
is making me mad
so you act just to spite?
how much sense does that make?
the angrier I get
depends on how much you take
I can't make you any promises
as I may act out of fear
or else I'll just sit here
drowning in my tears
these are the things
real girls worry about
it's something horrible
without a doubt.
I want you to remember me
not as the girl who was always scared
no, there's something I'd rather it be
the girl who cared.

i made you a promise
that I'd never tell
but I'll have to blab
to save you from this hell"

I'll love her, always and forever. Even if she is a little bitch sometimes. =D

So, now, I am a lot happier. I control my life. And I try to help others with their own. I have been through a lot more than explained here, but I feel it is not an appropriate time to share all of that. Basically, what I'm saying is that, if you need help or anything at all, I'll try my hardest to work it out.

advice


this is what i had so far today: (i just got home from school a little while ago)

breakfast: an oatmeal on the go breakfast bar & water (i only have time to eat on the bus lol.)

lunch: salad a fruit roll up and a few crackers

when i got home from school: pretzels and yogurt


i'm obviously gonna eat later, but i was wondering what range of calories should i have a day, and what else should i eat to help thin out my thighs and stomach a little bit (along with excersise)

thanks

This all depends on how old you are, and if you are male or female. If you are in your teens (anywhere from 13-17)you should have about 1500-2000 calories a day. (if the goal is weight loss, the closer to 1500, the better) If you are younger than that (12 and under) you shouldn't have more than 1500 calories a day. Anwhere older than 17, 2000 calories is about average. As for the excersising, crunches are good for toning your stomach, and those excersises where you put one leg in the air for about one second, alternating, and repeating are good. At the end of the leg excersise, you should hold both legs in the air for 10 seconds. This might take a while, but rather than making your legs look like twigs, you will hae some muscle. Hope this helps!

E-mail or IM me with any other questions,

Roxxana Starr

AIM: renastarr27
E-mail: chocoholic95624@aim.com

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ok so there is this guy at my school. i never talked to him b4 but i know who he is. then all of a sudden i noticed him looking at me in the hallway. i was looking at his myspace pics and i was like ur really hott. yea and then he said it bak to me on mine. i got his sn and we talked a little. then i started slowly saying hi to him in the hallway. its beeen a couple of weeks and we still havent talked. we both dont have the nerve i guess to just go up to eachother. i think he is really cool and hott but im too nervous for some reason. it wud be so much easier if we had classes together but we dont. we have none. and now he waved to me twice. but we still arent talking! its like so annoying! he is kind of hard to approach cause he just looks so cool and stuff and i dont even know wat to say to him!

i can tell he likes me and i i like him to. but we need to get to know each other first!

wat shud i do??????

i rate 5s!

please help. i really appreaciate it!

Hmm. If you really like him, and you think he's good enough for you, just get over your nervousness. (i know that sounds mean, but it isn't meant to be.) I used to be so shy that i wouldn't even talk to my relatives, friends, or even people i didn't know, but as soon as i put myself out there, I was never shy (or nervous) again. Have you tried thinking what about him makes you nervous? I hope this helps in a way,

Catch y'all, chicklet

Roxxana Starr

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