Gender: Male
Age: 23
Member Since: October 9, 2011
Answers: 1
Last Update: September 26, 2015
Visitors: 203
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I am currently going through so much and I am only 18. Everything for me is falling apart, no one cares about me, no one tries to help, and I an so alone. All I can think about is taking my own life. I don't have anyone who will miss me, or anything. I don't have anything to look foward, I just feel like giving up. I've tried so hard to stop thinking about it, but I can't. It's like it's already stuck in my mind. I harm myself every night, in hopes of actually dying but it's not working. I just can't take anything anymore, it hurts to feel so alone, it hurts to be so alone. I want to give up, I want to be gone. I just wish I had someone who cared, someone who loved me. But I don't, and that's driving me towards actually doing what's been on my mind. I don't want to live anymore. I just need advice on what I should do. (link)
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My guess is that you are worrying about your future too much. I have been in your place. I tried hanging myself when I was 19. The rope snapped and I survived. No one in my family knows it. I did have suicidal thoughts afterwards but I didn't go for it because I thought about my family. You will be leaving behind a scar that doesn't heal in time. About no one liking you. If people don't like you it's their problem. They are missing the chance to talk with a fantastic person like you.
I'm 24 now and still hurt myself once in a while. Both of us are kinda same in that. I have scars on my left hand which I take the trouble of hiding it from my mom. So I stopped. I'm employed and earning pretty well. At 19 I never thought I could earn but that's not the case now.
Things will change. You must probably be having a lot of free time. Get a new hobby. Remember an idle mind is a devil's workshop. The more you stay at home. the more these kinda thoughts creep through. Share your problems with someone who is trustworthy or seek a therapist. Do not hurt yourself. It isn't worth it. You will probably feel bad for it later.
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