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17/f
is it wrong to think lustfully about others? i mean i can understand if it gets 2 be a constant thing and you objectify them, then its bad.. but is it really that bad 2 have inappropriate thoughts if its only ocasionally? please help
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Sicne you haven't hinted at religious affiliation in your question, I'm not going to assume you're of any one religion or pitch to any set of beliefs.
No, it's not wrong to lustfully of others. Quite frankly, that's human. As you've said, as long as you don't constantly objectify others, it's not "bad". Lust is an incredibly natural thing - if we didn't have lust in nature, our race would do out because of lack of reproduction, right? Assuming you're asking this question because you've been having these thoughts recently and are feeling guilty - don't. It's normal, especially at 17.
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I am a 35 year old musician/composer/performer who currently resides in Los Angeles. I write soundtrack/rock/western and blues original tunes. I moved to Los Angeles 4 years ago to continue with musical group which was originally formed in Delaware in 1994. The band is still together and we have performed many times around the east and west coast as well as doing a random 2 week tour every 8 months. We have a fairly nice and loyal following and have independently released our own recordings(about 6 different CD's are available) and are now breaking into the realm of soundtracking with a self produced(yes, our own money) film the band is currently working on in Hollywood which is very exciting. Over the years I have become the main member of the group, we do not have a record contract or do not have a record label. Since this art is my passion I have put everything in my life into it. All my $$, time, relationships, and future plans have gone into my love to create for the last 11 years since its inception. I do not make any income with this project and work a part time job here in Los Angeles as a pizza delivery guy to help fund it and its driving me crazy! All I want to do is make a living out of the music I am soooo passionate about and have sacrificed sooo much for. This creative force inside governs my life and I feel it may actually be damaging in the long run to my well being because of feeling of not being completely successful. So what do I do? Tough it out and keep going or decide to throw in the towl? This question is too difficult for me to answer on my own. (link)
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This is a toughie. On one hand, there's the old axiom of always following your dreams. On the other hand, that's not always practical. You have to decide what you want more; stability and a higher paycheck (if you decide to try on a career as a working stiff), or your livelihood and music? I have some interesting insight into this. My father has been making music for the past 20 years; he has (at least) about 200 CDs worth of original music from the 6+ bands he's been in, side projects, and solo works. He's never hit it big and he remains largely unrecognized; in fact, I'm sure that some of his music will never be heard. However, he started a family, has a home, three cars, a pool, a hot tub, and, overall a functional life. In short, he's doing pretty well for himself, considering; he's living proof that you might not make it big, but you can still do what you love and carve out an existence for yourself...and not a bad one either!
The only downside is that he often laments the fact that he's 40-something now and has never made it big in the music world. So, I'd say that either way you're going to have ups and downsides. But ask yourself this: will you ever give up music, even if you quit trying to do it as a career? I would think not; most musicians could never give up music. While it's really up to you, my two cents: keep it up. At the very least, you'll probably still come out in the end with a life worth living.
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I'm a 14 yrs old girl, my boyfriend and i have been going out for about 2 months now and he's changed. He also thought i was cheating on him because i thought we were broken up so i told another boy we would talk. well I know my boyfriend still likes me and i still like him too. He never shows emotion like i never kno if he's mad sad or if he even cares but i know he cares. Since i don't kno he gets mad a lot. We also hardly talk and now he's talking about sex. Which i've been thinking about but why should i give him what he wants if he doesn't give me what i want someone to talk to. Should I stay with him to find out why he acts this way or if somethings going on that I don't know? or Should leave him alone and find someone new? but you have to keep in mind he doesn't tell me alot so there is alot I don't know about him. (link)
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Talk to him more. You have to be good friends with someone before you start a solid relationship with him/her. I'd recommend finding out more about him. Tell this 'other boy' that he'll have to wait, and you're in a weird place right now and at a relationship crossroads. Get to know your boyfriend better, and I'd recommend being more forward. Don't know if you're broken up or not? Why not just ask him? Can't tell if he's sad or mad? Ask him that too! You don't have to be incredibly blunt or anything, but I think you'll find that if you're direct, you can get surprisingly clear answers.
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Hey everyone!!
Well I met this guy through one of my friends and we went on our first date together. I thought everything worked out well so on the next day we went on another date. This next date all the guy wanted to do was have sex with me and he was all over me too. I'm really not sure if I should see him again or not because I know that he really wants to be with me but I'm not sure that I feel the same. (He's really sex- oriented). After our date he called me to rell me he wanted to hang out again. Should I give him an extra shot or just give up on him and move on, because all he wants is my a**.lol. Please help. Xo> I'll Rate!! (link)
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I think most women don't realize that they're in complete control. Really, if you like the guy, then give him another shot. It's the same old game, give a wolf a taste, and then keep him hungry. If he thinks that there's a chance of sex, in all honesty, you can keep him dangling for months at least
If you don't, and you think he just wants sex, then just dump him. Hanging out should be okay, as long as you're with other friends. But seriously, the females call the shots.
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If God gives humanity purpose and meaning, what gives God purpose and meaning?
Is God meaningless and purposeless?! If so, wouldn't that mean that humans are just meaningless and purposeless, and that their "meaning" and "purpose" given by God is purely arbitrary? (link)
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Well, the premise, "Something has to have been created to have meaning" doesn't really have a warrant. You can't necessarily prove this premise, it's sort of an assumption we've come to believe. I would argue that this is due to the inundation in the Christian dogma that your life can't have meaning without God. Thus, we've come to believe that something must have been created to have any meaning. Again, this claim isn't necessarily true.
As someone else said before him on this topic, God can find meaning in its own existence just as humans do for themselves. Consider the possibility that there is no God (a possibility, that, as an atheist, I accept). From this point, it is still possible for humans to find meaning in their life - I find meaning in mine everyday. If anything, life has more meaning because life becomes more precious. There's not a fairy-tale afterlife when all this is over, so it makes one cherish the time they have in this life.
Additionally, from a purely logical standpoint - God is supposed to be all-powerful. So, logically, God could simply will meaning for his existence into existence, if that makes sense.
I'm sure there are a number of other arguments on the subject, but the point is - God doesn't necessarily have no meaning just because it was created. In answer to your second question: from this argument, we can also conclude that humans are not just meaningless and purposeless, even if God doesn't have meaning, for the same reason. Humans don't need God to have meaning.
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My dad never graduated from college. He was offered a very nice job when he was a sophmore at college and he took the job to help pay for his 10 brothers and sisters to go to college. He works for Delta now as a dispatcher. He got a 30% Pay cut in January and now is getting another 15%. I`m really scared of whats going to happen to my family. Can he get another job if Delta goes under ? I haven`t had a hair cut in over a year and im wearing my brothers old shirts because we can't afford much right now. ( Both my brothers are in college so alot of our money is going there ) What is going to happen if Delta goes out of Business ? I`m really scared were going to be hommeless. I've tried talking to my parents about it but I start to cry every time becuase I`m afraid of what is going to happen. Please help :( (link)
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Worrying about things outside of our control can be pretty arbitrary, but it doesn't stop most of us from doing so (I can think of countless times when I've worried about something that I had absolutely no control over).
I can tell you right now that you're not going to become homeless. If you have any living relatives, chances are, if worst comes to worst, they'll let you stay with them. However, even if your dad does lose his job, it's not the end of the world. He may not have finished college, but that much experience with Delta isn't worth nothing. He might have to take a lower paying job, and perhaps other members of your family might have to work or pinch pennies, but going from your father losing his job to you being homeless is a bit of a stretch. I wouldn't worry so much about it.
Here's what I would do. I don't know how old you are, and I know it's tough, but consider getting a job. If you apply tenaciously and find a flexibile employer, you can put in hours after school and during the weekend. It'll suck at first, but you can help your family out with your paycheck, and you won't have to wear your brother's old shirts. Working, as I've stated, can be a bit tough the first time, but once the money rolls in it gets -much- easier. Again, I don't know how old you are, but even if you're young, mowing lawns is a very good source of income. So's babysitting (even as a guy I babysitted my junior year of high school making about anywhere from 40-70 bucks for a night).
To take your mind off of worrying, I'd try picking up a hobby to occupy yourself. Sports are usually good for that. If you can't stop thinking about what could happen, just try and focus on something else. Hopefully things will work out in the long run.
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Ok so i just called my boyfriend, and all of the sudden it feels like i cant even connect with him anymore. (I'm 13 and hes 16) I called him and asked if he was going to the football game Friday nite, and he said probably not. I was trying to hint to him that I was going and that I wanted to see him, but he would'nt really talk. so i lied and told him I needed to do my homework so I could get off the phone w/ him. What do you think we should talk about? (link)
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The whole "hinting" thing in love is usually a road to all sorts of confusion, miscommunication and other such things that no one wants to deal with. Miscommunication can be a serious problem in most relationships, and "hinting" can sometimes be the cause of that. If he says he's not going, and you try to hint that you're going, you might not get the message across. Instead of hinting next time, tell him you want to see him. The best way to accomplish anything in relationships is to just come out and say it.
This doesn't mean be ridiculously blunt or anything - you can still sugar-coat things, but don't beat around the bush if you have something important to say.
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Okay, you probably already know this, but my best friend in the whole world is Mormon. She believes she's a Christian, but I know that Mormons are not. I also know a lot of her friends too. I am worried about them. I want to be able to tell them what is wrong with it, but I don't want to be like "I have been your friend for a whole year and I love you and by the way, you are going to hell." Cuz that would really suck. I recently made a comment on someone's site saying that I believed Mormonism to be non-Christian, as did the owner of the site. My friend has seen it, and now she wants to know what I am talking about. I really want to save my friend, but she is a strong mormon with a strong mormon background, and I don't know what to do... I hate thinking that someday I may never see her again if she were to get in a car accident or something.
Sites if you want to know more:
http://www.icubed.com/~rpoe/mormons.htm
http://www.concernedchristians.org/
http://www.leaderu.com/orgs/probe/docs/mormon1.html
http://mormonconspiracy.com/
http://www.mormon.org/
http://lds.org/
http://www.gracevestal.org/truth.htm
All of those sites may not be legit, or even helpful, but I really want to be able to do something about this. It is entirely possible that she doesn't know that she does not believe what other Christians believe. I have read so many books and such and it just kills me to know that she is involved with this and doesnt even know how bad it is.
I am not saying that Latter-day saints are bad, because most of them are really nice....I just know that their interpretation of Jesus is different and I wish there was a nice way to show them what I believe and help them.
Some of the main differences between mormons and christians:
belief that the trinity is 3 separate gods vs. the trinity is 3 persons in one god.
belief in salvation through works vs. salvation in believing in jesus christ
reguarding the book of mormon as more important than the bible vs. reguarding the bible as the only true book from god.
this has been bugging me for the last year and i really want to do something without jepordizing my friendship with her. she is curious now because of the comment on that other person's xanga.
also, if you know who i am talking about, please do not tell her i am going behind her back, because i am afraid she will be mad. i am simply trying to help her and her family and friends because i care so much about her that i never want to be uncertain of what will happen if she were to pass.... and i have a feeling that the person whose xanga i commented on will feel the same way, if not more of you....
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"I have been your friend for a whole year and I love you and by the way, you are going to hell."
As an atheist (and one who countless people have tried to convert), I can tell you right now that the whole, "You're going to hell," statement usually does not go over very well.
I do not support converting people to your religion, but if you're hell-bent (no pun intended) on doing so, instead of preaching, try to open your friend's eyes to what your religion has to offer. Usually, saying that your religion is right and her's is wrong without having a reason why doesn't work. She has to want to convert, not be forced into it.
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