Member Since: February 24, 2012
Answers: 3
Last Update: February 24, 2012
Visitors: 634
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I have a good life. I have a good future, friends family and yet... for sometime I keep thinking about death, about all the ways I can die. I think of the easiest ways, the quickest and I find myself wanting an almost painful end. I have a good life, but at the same time, I want to leave it. I want to leave my future, my friends, family, people, and I hate myself for it, yet I hate myself for wanting attention, for wanting someone to notice that the smile I have on is killing me and all I want to do is sleep and forget everything but I can't because I have school and friends and they don't know how to handle me when I'm like this, I know because when I've told them they become scared of me and it makes me hate myself for making feel that way so I hurt them so they'll stop wanting to be around me and find someone better to be with but at the same time I can't let go of them and I know I'm poisonous and it's hurting them but I can't help it... I thought I was doing really well for a while but now I feel like I can't stand living but I can't stand the thought of death and I love the people around me but I hate them for loving me so I hurt them then I hate myself... I don't understand why I'm this and I can't take to them but I'm scared of being alone, the thought of calling someone scares so me much but I hate being alone with myself because I am a horrible person and I just want to die, but I'm too much of a coward to do it... I don't know what to do or why I'm like this... Please, does anyone understand? I need help but I don't want myself to be helped... I have a good life but I don't why I'm not valuing like people say I should ... I need help, I can't handle myself like this... (link)
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I'm not going to tell you that I know exactly how you feel because no one can but I will tell you that I have been in your shoes. I have felt that same torment, wanting to die and not understanding why. I hated myself for so long and pushed away almost everyone that cared about me. I know how it feels to be screaming inside, begging for just one person to be able to hear you, begging for someone to reach out and tell you, you aren't alone. I spent far too long doing physical harm to myself because at least when I was bleeding I had a reason to feel all the pain I had inside, at least there was a justification for it. As I got older, there was a constant battle going on inside of me. I had to fight not to run my car off the road, swallow the whole bottle of medicine instead of the regular dose or just slice my apple instead of my wrists. There were days that I was just so tired of fighting, I was so exhausted that I just wanted to give up. I didn't ever get any help, as far as anyone knows I was fine but I wish I had. You are not alone and you are not crazy! Other teenagers may not be able to relate and may just back away because they are scared of your feelings, but there are people who will listen who will be there for you unconditionally and won't look at you like you're nuts when you explain how you feel. Friends like these are rare but they do exist just hang in there! If you ever need to talk, I'm here and I do understand! Love856@hotmail.com
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I am 16 years old and im a girl.im a really depressed person and i dont know where to turn.i have no one to talk to.i dont really have any friends.and i dont have any one to talk to in my family either.i have decided to turn to talk to strangers.Can anyone tell me a specific site to go on to be able to really talk to someone and vent all my feelings?and maybe if one of you guys would like to talk to me?
Thanks.i would really appreciate any useful advice.
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I feel your pain and I would be more than happy to help. Teenage years are rough and especially so if you feel like an outsider and have no support system. I had a really difficult time with friends and depression when I was your age. There were times when I felt so alone I wanted to scream, I had no idea what to do and the thought of no longer existing was oddly comforting. In my family, my siblings were very sick. I was not only the eldest but also the only healthy one, therefore, I spent most of my time alone and guilty, feeling like my feelings weren't as important or I didn't have the right to feel the way I did.
Here's what I've learned; popularity is overrated, seek friends who see the real you because even if you aren't sure who that is right now, those people will help you find her. Don't ever try to be someone you aren't just to fit in, it won't feel as good as you think.
You aren't crazy! Hormones are messing with your whole body right now, especially your brain! Don't be too hard on yourself and know that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Your feelings really do matter, don't compare your pain to anyone elses. Just because someone else may trivialize what you're feeling doesn't mean that you feel it any less, they are your feelings and you are allowed to feel them!
Open your heart and let love in, I know it sounds cheesy, trust me though. Whether it's friendship or romantic, the fear of being hurt can be strong and may be justified but don't shut yourself off, you deserve to be happy just as much as anyone, believe that and happiness will find its way to you! Email me anytime love856@hotmail.com!!!
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Can you get pregnant if you are a virgin, but you touch a condom which has sperm in it, then go to the toilet and wipe, can the sperm spread? And can you get pregnant by this if you are a virgin? (link)
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Getting pregnant this way is next to impossible. Sperm can only live outside the body for a short period of time,(minutes maybe hours in the right conditions)Also, most condoms these days have some type of spermicide which would further increase sperm death, it is highly unlikely that you would have transferred live sperm from that condom to yourself especially by simply wiping yourself in the bathroom. I wouldn't worry about it.
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