Member Since: June 13, 2006
Answers: 2
Last Update: June 13, 2006
Visitors: 651
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I am divorced, my 15 y.o. son (whose mother has custody) has decided that he doesn't want to spend this Saturday with me. In the past, he has always spent the entire Father's Day weekend with me. In addition, about a week ago, I informed my son that his Uncle (who my son really gets along with - and lives out-of-State) will be having breakfast with us on Saturday. Now, my son says that he wants to celebrate Saturday with his step-father. However, he has never celebrated mother's day with his step-mom. I am enraged and don't know what to do. (link)
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First off, make sure your intentions are pure. Do you want to spend Father's Day with your son because you love him and it is special to you, or do you want him to spend the time with you because you're jealous of him spending it with his step-father?
Do you still have a good relationship with his mother, as friends? If so, see if she can perhaps talk to him about what Father's Day means to you. Or you could talk about it with him yourself, by phone or e-mail.
Bottom line is, you need to somehow communicate and you need your son to know how you feel. LISTEN UP THOUGH! If you talk to him, don't talk to him as a parent. Talk to him as a friend. If you let your anger at the situation show then I won't blame your son for not spending the weekend with you.
Still, try to be understanding about him wanting to spend the weekend with his step-father. That's like his "second Dad."
Here's another idea: Why don't you plan another weekend that you two can spend together, doing something fun that you will both enjoy? That way, your son can spend time with you and spend time with his step-father.
Most importantly: whatever happens, *don't hold a grudge!*
Grudges cause rifts in relationships and cause a lot of hurt, anger, and strife.
Good luck!
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I cheated on my boyfriend, Trey about a week ago. I am absolutley in love with him but we got into a huge argument and he said some really mean things so I went off and hooked up with this one kid that he totally HATES just to make him mad. Well, he didn't end up finding out and the night before last he called me and apologized and sent me a totally sweet email, and so I felt like I had to tell him the truth so I did and he started crying and then I started crying and I felt soooo bad.
the email said..
"You know that feeling you get when you’re about to do something like go on a big roller coaster and you’re scared out of your mind because its so high up but yet you still can’t wait? Or when you’re on an airplane and you’re going to see someone you haven’t seen in a really long time and you’re about to land and you absolutely can’t wait and you’re so happy and you feel like you could just fly, like if you fell out of the airplane right then it wouldn’t matter because you could do anything… that’s how I feel when I talk to you. Its like, nothing bad could ever happen as long as I’m talking to you and even though we fight constantly I’d rather be arguing with you then doing anything with anyone else. I’m so sorry for what I said and I’d be lost without you." yeah so basically i'm in love with him and I feel like shit for making him upset. He said he forgave me and that he loves me no matter what and I believe him but I still feel absolutley terrible for it and I want to find some way to make it up to him. Does anybody have any ideas??? (link)
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Wow, first of all, let me tell you how lucky you are. Most people would have an extremely different reaction if their girlfriend/boyfriend cheated on them. There would be a LOT more anger in most cases. So you should definitely THANK him for forgiving you.
Now.. making it up to him. You have a lot to do now. I think that you should tell him how you feel, making sure that he knows how much you care about him (and hopefully he will trust you a little more). You can do this in a letter, a poem, or just plain talking to him.
Of course, it might be a good idea to buy him something nice as well. It shows him that you still love him enough to spend your money on him. ;)
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