Member Since: November 26, 2018
Answers: 1
Last Update: November 26, 2018
Visitors: 341
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This is probably jumbled and random. I'm a little upset, so I apologize. Thank you in advance.
When I was little, my maternal grandmother lived with us a lot. I had a very close relationship with her, as I do with my mother. Her whole life she's had a hard time with personal relationships, and she's moved around and met different men, none of which have been pleasant. Right now she lives with an old man with a farm, and he's a little off his rocker, and doesn't like to go out or be around people, and besides getting anxious sometimes, he isn't that bad of a guy. However, they have this idea that they just cannot leave the farm unless they need something because they might get sick, and of course, they can't afford that. I haven't seen my grandmother in around a year, even though she lives about half an hour away. My step dad and 8 year old brother saw them from across the street at a gas station. They all made eye contact, but couldn't even be bothered to wave. Just last year, when I was still in highschool I had a lead roll in our winter musical, and we were doing South Pacific. It's my grandmother's favorite, and she promised she'd come see. It was the only thing that kept me from dropping out. She didn't come. Graduation rolled around, and I sent out invitations. She sent me a letter saying that she and her boyfriend or whatever he is would "be there in spirit." I cried both times. I know she's never had the best mental health, but it makes me angry. I want to write her a letter, but I don't even know what to say to her. My mother hasn't really ever had the best relationship with her, and it's at it's worst right now. They haven't spoken in months. Grandma sends occasional cards. She doesnt know what my siblings are up to, she doesn't know I moved out, or that I'm seeing someone. I'm so hurt by her lack of action, but I miss her. I know where they live, and I want to go see her, but I don't know if that would be the right course of action. I'm upset right now, so this whole thing is probably very jumbled. I also don't know if I should take how my mom would feel if I went to see her into consideration. I'm 18 and it's not really any of her business, but I love my mother very much. Also, I don't see or talk to my family much, despite living 8 blocks away, and I don't want another confrontation about it..
I want to see my grandmother again. What should I do??? (link)
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Hey, I know things in your family aren't like you wanted them to be, so I'm sorry you had to face it. Your loved ones bring a happiness in your life that certain things can not fill, I can imagine the pain you are feeling and the doubts that go through your mind. But you're 18 years old and you live alone, you can decide what you think is best for yourself, if seeing your grandmother will make you happy, you should go see her. Follow your heart. I think you should take the initiative to talk to your mother and let her know that you want to see your grandmother. I believe you should take the first step and go see your grandmother and see what happens. See if this will help you and help bring you closer and maybe even your mother and her closer too. I'm sure she didn't want to hurt you for not showing up at these important events you wanted and needed her. Now, if you go and nothing changes, know that it's not your fault and sometimes families move away. You can still love her and take care of her while she's not around her yet. Maybe in the end, if it doesn't work out, send her cards like she does to you. But I'm sure everything will work out. Try to go see her.
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