Hey i am female, 14, and im going into high school next year. I am not experienced in many ways, but i am mature. I dont sugarcoat things, and i am bold and tell it like it is. If you want my advice, let me know! xoxo
Gender: Female
Member Since: January 24, 2008
Answers: 27
Last Update: February 21, 2008
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Just under 6 months ago a friend of mine needed a place to stay after breaking up with a live in boyfriend. I offered my home and she moved in. I had just purchased my first home and had bitten off a little more than I could chew in the amount of money the new home cost me in mortgage payments and other associated expenses. After my friend had been there for 3 weeks, I determined that we could reasonably get along as roommates and asked her if she wanted to make the situation more permanent and she agreed to pay one third of my home expenses. I thought I had found the perfect solution to my money problems as her rent would allow me to make my payments without problem and even give me a little extra to pay off some credit card bills. Unfortunately that was not to be the case. Shortly after she moved in, she lost both her full time job and her part time job and even though she found another full time job right away, she had money issues in that her wages were garnished for back child support and other expenses. Even though she had agreed to pay me a certain amount every month, this money never materialized and things got to the point where I had to beg her for money. I realize that she has money problems and other than the money situation she makes a great roommate, but I am hurting financially and find myself not only covering all of the bills, but also paying for the majority of the groceries and even giving her money for essentials such as gas to get by. I want to be a good friend and help her through her problems but am afraid that if I continue like this much further that I may lose the ability to pay my own bills which could jeopardize my keeping my new home. I am on medicaton for depression and other medical problems and have always had a problem with confrontation and feel guilty at the prospect of asking her to move out when I know she has nowhere to go. How do I stand up for myself without totally ruining our friendship and putting her in an even worse situation at the possibility of being homeless? (link)
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This is a hard situation she has put you in. Sit her down and talk to her. Tell her that you have had money problems, and need her to pay the rent, and tell her you want to help her, but you also need to help yourself and not go into debt. If she says she cant pay, tell her that she has to start looking for her own home, but can stay in yours until she moves into her new home. It may hurt a little but its better than pretending nothing is wrong, and getting youu into financial trouble.
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