I am a Psychology major who truly enjoys writing and giving advice as one of the many hobbies pursued.
I'm a pretty laid back, can be lazy and sometimes sensitive/uptight person (not all the time though; depends on the beef we might have :) ) who hates to see others get hurt or lied to.
I would like to think it's because of my laid back, empathetic and understanding nature that is what helps me give pretty good advice most of the time and have had many people honestly come to me in the past.
I hope that it happens here with many of you. :)
Gender: Female
Age: 23
Member Since: October 26, 2007
Answers: 2
Last Update: October 28, 2007
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O.k well what can i say. My "friend" is a bich. she caused my bf to break up with me(long LONG story) and she is such a winey baby.
Like she "hurt" her jaw(don't ask me how) but somehow she "hurt" it. and know she talks with her teeth like tottaly stuck together(i KNOW FOR A FACT that she is faking)she is such an attention junkie. she also flirts with EVERYONE(guys). that's how my bf left me(he was annoyed with her) and she also is abosolutly the MOST ANNOYING person in the WORLD....
You probly think that i am being harsh or mean or that i am somehow possibly jealous of her.....but i am not. she is that way. even my other friends think we should "dump her" as a friend.
WHAT do i do???? (link)
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Honestly? I would suggest that you confront her and tell her how you feel, and how her actions are making you feel.
Trust me when I say that keeping any emotions inside, let alone the obvious resentment that you harbor for your friend, is not at all a good thing and is only a recipe for disaster. Because then, if you're not honest with her from the start but in a weakened moment you vent to some of your other friends whom you believe you can trust and whom either do or don't feel the same for her as you now do, THEY might go and tell HER without thinking or on purpose and in spite (or someone else who will tell another, causing the whole "word-of-mouth" sequence).
And then, of course, I don't have to tell you what will most definitely occur as a result of that: Drama, and nothing but drama. YOU'LL suddenly look like the one with all of the "issues" and two-faced, and just as harsh and/or mean as you don't wish to be perceived.
So, definitely, the best route IS to just confront her, but not in the "You're an annoying bitch and I don't want to have anything to do with you!" way. Run it by your mutual friends (who apparently agree that she's been a tad too self absorbed lately, based upon what you've written) first, and once you've all agreed upon exactly what you'll say and how you'll say it THEN go ahead and talk to her.
A few suggestions, if I may, would to just express to her how she used to be (assuming she used to be a fun-loving kind of person, otherwise I don't see how you'd be friends with her in the first place if she generally wasn't, seeing as how you don't seem to get along well with those with heavy attitudes or are conceited), and how lately she has been acting differently. Tell her that it's honestly been bothering all of you a bit and making you all wonder about her.
Let her know that you all are concerned and wondering if everything is all right with her and at home or what have you.
Chances are very strong that, if she's suddenly acting like some attention-seeking psycho, so to speak, when she normally isn't (or maybe not as much, anyway) then it's because she subconsciously and secretly WANTS someone to notice and "call her out" on it so that she CAN hopefully open up and talk about what may really be the issue.
And, if sadly all of this doesn't go the way you hope it to (which is, have it all be resolved for the better and all of you still remain friends with her) and she unfortunately takes far too MUCH offense to everything, (And trust me, she WILL take a great deal of offense once confronted) then you might have to unfortunately face the fact that you very well might have to "dump her" as you'd described. Because if she won't be able to understand, all defensiveness aside, that you confronted her because you just wanted to honestly know what's up with her lately, then she wasn't that very good a friend to begin with and the both of you are simply better off.
It won't be pretty, and it definitely won't be easy. But it's bothering you, clearly, and won't go away until you take the plunge and face your friend.
Best of luck to you, and please let me know how everything went! :)
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