SandyDandy's advice column | SandyDandy's Advice About Friendship

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Q: so there is this guy lets call him nate. well he is pretty popular. he is the cutest guy in the school. I dont really talk to him. I talk to him in classes that i have with him but outside of school not really. well he seems to always be messing with me. I think i am overreacting but its kinda been on my mind. Like he always ask to put his papers in my binder before lunch so he doesnt have to go to his locker. He always ask me for some paper even when people right by him has it. I dont really think it means anything i just think he knows that im usually prepared. When we are having a discussion in class and then the teacher is like whose turn is it to discuss and he is like Stefani! Last year in english class we had alot of boys in our class so we had to split up in groups and a girl had to be in every group so he was like we got stefani!and then in another class he would mess with me and im like why are you always messing with me and he was like i always mess with me see i will mess with jordan. well im thinking im talking about a girl. because it seems like im the only girl he picks with and in every class he seem like he talks to me the most out of every girl. Im not saying he likes me because I doubt that he would because im not his type. and im pretty postive on this. Im just think he respects me more than most girls. but yet he seems to like laughing at me. like a guy today said something about me and he just laughs but if it was some other girl he would just sit there and look. so i dont really know. also he seems like he is slightly turning around to look back at me. like he will turn and stretch and just glance at me quite of few times. I dont really think its anything but yet it just seems a little suspicious. I have bad judgement with these kind of things. well what do you think?

I think he using your for easy A's in school, you're just like his "school girl" that will help him out. Trust me, i had a friend like this and he does that like "glances at you" or "laughs when people say stuff about you" because he wants to keep you around and make you feel special.
But he does it on purpose trust me, i knew a really good friend of mine who did this, just for the hell of it(he told me about it and did the same things), but didn't realize the girl would actually think something else! And about the group thing it just proves how he just wanted you in his group to have it all easy basically like saying "I got the smart girl!".
But i mean unless it's hurting you then just talk to him, but if i was you if he asked me to hold his papers i would be like "uh, why don't you?" and if he said please or something then yeah, but don't just let him use you like that so easily like don't be afraid to say "no." to him,cause it kinda seems like he is managing you pretty well, but you don't have to do anything you don't want to.
Hope i helped-SandyDandy(:

Q: hi im 15/f and i have a boyfriend whos gay i know its strange but there a good reason why this happened. i met him a year ago as my other self. im pansexual and i crossdress i feel like im a boy inside and i act it out online not in a bad way i promise but i have an account i use for my boy side. well he messaged me one day and we started talking. we both fell for eachother and now a year later we still havent seen eathother its been a long distance relationship. he still doesnt know my real gender and i really want to tell him. one day i asked him if he would still love me if i was a girl and he said that he would still love me no matter what, he loves me for whats on the inside. even though he has said this to me i cant find the words to tell him. ive been trying to make him break up with me so i wouldnt hurt him anymore but he wont leave me. and when i break up with him my heart hurts,it beats an empty beat. i dont know whats wrong with me. i love him with all my heart and i dont want this lying anymore, all i want is for him to be happy. please help me.

Well somethings are just hard to do when they are right, but trust me it is wellll worth it, it will take a huge load of your chest.
You just have to tell him there is not other way around it except not talking to him anymore.And i think what ya'll share is something too good to let go of just because you don't have the courage to tel him. Plus that will hurt him even more if you just leave him like this.
If you really love him you have to come out and say it, and easy way to do it would be like saying "You know how i told you if i was a girl would you still love me...well there is a reason i asked it's because i'm a girl but feel like a boy." Or something like that!
Hope you really gather the courage to tell him. Good luck(: SandyDandy.

Q: 13/f
i have this one guy in four of my classes and hes so sweet and funny but i think he likes me and i just wanna be friends cuz i like this other guy...so i dont want to send him the wrong message but how do i let him know i wanna be just friends?

Just don't flirt, spend too much time with him, or hug him or have a lot of physical contact, don't talk to him too much or be too friendly with him, because guys most of the time take friendliness the wrong way. And let him know like "hey buddy.." Or i'm glad we are Friends so you can hook me up with your buddies or just jokes like that, to let him know that you are not interested in specifically him lol!:] This has happened to me before and this seems to work for me. Good luck-SandyDandy(:
Ask me questions on my advice column if you need more help.

bio

howdy!:)
I currently i'm in college studying counseling.So you can't imagine how much i love giving advice and just being there to listen.It is basically what i want to do for the rest of my life.I never think a question is too much or too stupid to ask. I love just helping people out. SO please don't be afraid to ask. IM HERE:)