Hi, my name is Charlotte, and I'm a 25 year old, college graduate. I really enjoy helping people out with anything I can because I know we've all got questions that need answers! I'm available anytime for your questions, and if you need any other kind of help, pick-me-ups or just a little understanding, I have a blog:
http://shrinkingmentals.blogspot.com/
Check it out or direct your questions to me and I'll do my best to help shed a lil light!
-Charlotte
Website: Therapy For Free: Because Shrinks Cost Too Much E-mail: such.sweet.decorum@gmail.com Gender: Female Location: The United States of America Age: 25 Member Since: December 17, 2009 Answers: 44 Last Update: January 12, 2010 Visitors: 3790
Main Categories: Love Life Families View All
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im forteen and my parents still wont let me out after dark and its really annoyng becasue all my friends can, how could i convince them to let me out later. they know im not the type to go out and get drunk and stuf like that, but i really wont to be allowed out later but how ? any help please :) (link)
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The way to gaining more independence and more responsibility is to show them that you are responsible and honest. If they see that, they will allow more freedom.
If there happens to be a function or event that will go until after dark, ask your parents to go and tell them that it will go until after dark and that you will be home when it ends. Give them a definite time. Tell them who is going to be there, where you are going exactly, and keep them up to date if something changes. Tell them you will be home exactly when you say you'll be home. Say you'll be home at 10:00 p.m. Be there at 10:00 p.m. Or even 9:50 p.m. Don't be five minutes late or ten minutes late. Be punctual. Everytime.
Try it for one event and then continue coming home before dark. Then try another event. Keep showing them that when they let you out after dark, you come home when you say you're coming home.
If you deviate from the plan, show up when you feel like it, don't tell them when things change, if something happens and you're not where you said you would be, they don't know where you are and what you're doing or if you're hurt. They need to be kept in the loop. You can text them, probably without your friends knowing, to keep them informed. I'm assuming you have a cell phone. Or you could call them. Either way, always tell your parents where you are going. Legally, you cannot run around and do whatever you want without their permission, until you are 18. The authorities do not consider you adult enough and neither will your parents. Some towns even have a curfew for underaged individuals. Be smart.
The bottom line: If you show them on a regular basis that you can be trusted and relied on, they will be more likely to let you stay out later. But don't push your luck and start coming home at midnight or one in the morning. Nothing good ever happens past midnight and your parents do not want you running around as young as you are. Because your parents will not sleep comfortably until you are home.
I hope this helps and I hope it all works out for you!
-Charlotte
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i am getting ready to go into court to fight for custody of my daughter and i need to know how to defend both myself and her.
her "biological factor" impregnated me as a minor and he was 15 yrs older then me.(no i didnt know that)
he has only seen her twice in almost 4 years and one of those days was a court date
he claims he has an attorney but he filled out paperwork saying hes representing himself.
i have myspace messages and text messages of him saying i can have her
he is still lieing to me but if its one against one then i may not be able to prove it
please if you have any suggestions other then getting a lawyer i would love to hear them
and do you know if i can use the text messages and myspace messages? (link)
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I agree with the above answer, but also, do not converse anymore with him on the matter personally. Hire an attorney and have them mediate. The biggest trouble you can get in is communicating without an attorney. Record whatever you can, and make sure it is the truth. Judges will want proof, although they do take heresay into account.
What you should be thinking about is what is the most beneficial to your daughter. And you should express this to the judge. Do not bad mouth your husband in front of the judge, as this will only make them see you in a less flattering light. You want to be mature and persistent in expressing the best possible situation for your daughter. Always keep her and her well-being in mind and put her wishes before your own.
But yes, hire an attorney.
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