about

People have come to me for advice for decades now. I think it's because I take notes on life, my experiences, and my research, I avoid (as best I can) being preachy, and I try in some way to remind the inquirer or concerned party that what I'm saying is only from me, one person.
I have to admit that verbosity, or being too wordy or long-winded, is my downfall. I'm definitely working on and getting better about it. But, hey, everyone has one, right?

advice

I work at itailian resturant and i get a pay check every couple of weeks but for the most of my shifts I get paid under the table. What i want to know is are the people paying doing tax fruad?

Your employers are committing tax evasion, punishable by law. But make no mistake you are as well, also punishable by law.
I recommend getting a legitimate job, in which both parties are taxed. It keeps you outta trouble in the long run.

Here I've included some website links that may make things a bit more clear for you:

http://www.businessweek.com/debateroom/archives/2009/07/under-the-table_pay_is_unacceptable.html

This is a link to an article discussing the pros and cons of the "under the table" payment system, as it's generally understood.



http://www.lectlaw.com/def2/t006.htm

This one gives you the legal definition of tax evasion.



http://www.irstaxattorney.com/penalty.html

This link gives you information for tax evasion penalties.



Good luck,
Jaimes :-)

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What does it mean when a guy rapidly wiggled his tongue at you from between his teeth?

It's usually sexual gesture, it can insinuate just about anything but mostly it's a "dirty-minded" expression. I've found that it's mostly done to provoke people and make them feel uncomfortable.

Good luck,
Jaimes :-)

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My boyfriend doesn't take blame for things, its ALWAYS someone else's fault, never his. He will make me feel guilty for things that have gone wrong in his life, that he was actually fully responsible for.

Its not a huge issue for now, but its just something that I've been noticing. I haven't talked to him about it YET, and I don't think he realizes that it kind of hurts me.

Could this be a bigger issue? I know its one of the signs of an abusive person, but otherwise he treats me well and respects me. He takes good care of me and is loyal.

Open lines of communication are so vital to a healthy, respectful relationship, and they're some of the most difficult things to establish.
I picked up some tones of resentment in your inquiry, which makes perfect sense when you're feeling unseen or like your thoughts and feelings aren't being considered. And sometimes feeling enables our defenses.
I must suggest relaxing, it's better for your general sense of well being and will allow you to see things from a clearer and more thoughtful perspective. If you want him to understand your concerns it's a good idea to be understanding of him as well.
If and/or when a situation arises which appropriately calls for his accountability, try to treat this situation as if it is the first and only situation of it's kind. If he doesn't take accountability for this situation, try not to include any frustration that you may have that would reflect any previous history of these types of situations. This keeps it simple for you and hopefully approachable for him.
Own your feelings, remembering that no one has power over you and therefore doesn't have the power to "make" you feel anything. This doesn't mean that you don't or shouldn't be feeling effected by his lack of responsibility. Your feelings will almost always be valid and you should feel good about standing by their validity.
Saying something like, "When you said this about this I felt like you might've felt that it was somehow my fault. And I want you to understand that it is not my fault, though I do understand that it totally sucks(ed)." A response like this allows you to stand up for yourself, point out your concern with where the blame is being placed (which gives him the opportunity to actually look at where it should be placed, if any), and validate not only your feelings but his as well.
This may or may not be the exact answer for you and your situation, but it's worth a shot, and actually I suggest trying it on 2 or 3 occassions before you toss it out.
If you have any further questions please feel free to ask.
Good luck,
Jaime :-)

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