about

I live on the East Coast of the USA. I now work in the movies (rigging electrician or grip), but hold a B.S. in Psychology and a B.S. in Biology From Virginia Commonwealty University.

I have traveled a great deal, inside of the states, and have had many unusual life experiences. I'm a 35 year old man, bored but happy!

advice

I have a question...I think I'm slightly bi-polar. Because I go through the day wiht emotions allll over the place. 2 classes, for example, I'll be sitting there just dozing off tired and not happy...the next class ill find something randomly hilarious. the next class ill be depressed about myself, adn by the end of the day im laughing agian. its really weird. its not serious, but its been like this for so long and i hate being depressed and not happy. half the time i dont even know why im so sad......please help? any suggestions?

Let me start off by answering your first question. You are not exhibiting the diagnostic features associated with BPD. To be diagnosed with BPD you would have to have the “manic” phase or the “depressive” phase for all or almost all of the day, for a week or more. This means either or, not both in the same day many times. Each of the phases also can only be diagnosed if they appear in conjunction with at least 5 other symptoms. I wont list the additional symptoms here, but they can be found in the DSM-IV or on a mental health related website.

Having said this, I do not want you to think that I am discounting your suffering. Just because you may have misdiagnosed your self does not mean that you are not having serious difficulties. If you are experiencing issues that are causing problems in your life (including large amounts of stress), or causing you to think about hurting yourself or someone else, I would highly recommend talking it over with someone. This can be your spiritual leader, school counselor, parent or family doctor. I know this sounds like a cookie cutter answer, but it really is almost always a good choice when you are overwhelmed with an issue.

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I get angry a lot now...for many reasons...I scream at my dad. Like today, just now, I woke up late, which puts me off schedule, which made me mad, so I started screaming, then I cut myself on my wooden drawer, and I slammed my foot down so hard, that I now have a bruise on my heel. I am afraid I'll go off like this on my friends, and they'll all leave me. What I need is someone to love me unconditionally, and someone to help me stop getting angry; At least that's what I think. Please help! I feel embarrassed about this, and am afraid I embarrass my dad and maybe will embarrass my friends...

From what I read it is not clear if you are injuring yourself on purpose, or if it is an accidentally injury as a result of your anger. If you are self-injury on purpose, I would highly recommend talking it over with your parents, school counselor, or family doctor.

You are experiencing some difficulty with controlling your emotions. You did not state your age, but I am guessing somewhere between 13 and 16? Around this age you are going through massive hormonal and other physical / psychological changes. It is not at all uncommon for people going through this difficult time to experience issues just like you are describing. A few methods in anger control may help you get through this time in the short term. A very good link for this is: http://www.meaning.ca/articles/anger_management_april03.htm

On the web page listed above you will find several metods of dealing with anger. I am going to copy and paste some of it here, but I would recommend going to the page and read it in its entirety:
*“Most of the anger management techniques are designed to achieve one or more of the above four types of control. Here are some of the commonly known anger-control techniques:
· Relaxation - Breathing exercise, muscle relaxation, imagery, etc.
· Cognitive reframing - Changing the way we think about the situation
· Humor - Seeing the humorous side of a bad situation
· Talking to someone - Talking about your problem and feelings
· Redirecting your anger - Hitting a pillow or throwing darts
· Changing your situation - Changing your job or moving to a different place
· Assertive training - Learning to assert yourself and communicate your feelings
· Problem-solving - Trying to resolve the problem that makes you angry “

* Quoted from Paul T. P. Wong, Ph.D. in his artice on the above web site.



I would like for you to remember that this internal turmoil is not permanent, and probably not particularly long term. Don’t let it wreck your life with anxiety and fear of “what if” type scenarios.

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do i have to worry if my teen is emo--he quit swim team --does not like coach --"different"--don't "know him anymore"---artistic --freshman in large public high school--decent student --oldest child in family of 3 children, mom and dad

Just from the information that you provided, I do not see anything that should be troubling. It is important to maintain a good line of communication with your child, so making an issue of relatively innocuous things may cause more long term problems, due to a breakdown in trust.

Having said this, some of the warning signs of serious problems can be a radical change in behavior, attitudes and interests. Teenagers are well known for being fickle and rebellious. It is up to the parent to know their child well enough to be able to distinguish between the two, or recognize when professional assistance may be in order. As long as the child is not exhibiting behavior that is likely to cause himself or another person injury, I would advise letting the subject explore who he is, and how they want to interact with the world around them.

Give the child a loving, safe and open relationship with his caregivers and most of the small issues will work themselves out in a healthy way.

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