Member Since: August 7, 2012
Answers: 1038
Last Update: August 2, 2021
Visitors: 33735
|
| |
|
I've answered about 20 questions. Gotten 3 ratings and one thank you. I started doing this cause I like giving advice and helping. The problem is that we don't even know if the person who asked the question even saw your answer. The only way to know is if your answer is rated or you get a thank you. I feel like I spend a lot of time on here and I'm just giving advice to nobody. It kinda takes away the whole "helping people" if you don't even know they read your answer. Sure, its good practice to answer some questions, figure things out about myself. Just not sure if its worth the time to keep answering questions that may never find their target. Maybe I'll look for a site that tells you the person read it, at least. Feeling a little discouraged. (link)
| |
No answer does not necessarily mean the person has not read your advice. We can't force help on people, only offer a new approach, try to shed some light and so on. Your advice, per se, may not be what they want to hear at the time and so the response is likely to be a rotten remark. Purely becuase it does not converge very closely (or at all!) to what they fundamentally 'want to hear'. The advice may well be very sound. Peoples problems are rarely two-dimensional, and a 'good-bad' evaluation is not always possible either. Neither are they always so definitely resolved by a single reply. And an instant response is not a thing we really have a right to expect every time. Possibly it sometimes plants a 'seed' of an idea which may indeed grow and flower when the time is right? Maybe some of your thoughts will slowly be factored-in to their reasonning. Along with other ideas. Don't get disheartend if you don't get a gushing thanks and a gold star every time mate. Not by any means. Their (our?) problems are often too subtle, complex and multi-staged to fit into this rather rigid framework. Remember there are more ways to open a door than banging on it. People other than the recipient browse the replies. Many may find some real gold in a reply YOUR recipient seems to have overlooked, or even dismissed. You'll maybe never know for sure. Taking away the instant gratification of a response does not make your effort futile. Counselling (which is what you're doing) should of course never be about YOU imposing your idea on the subject. Recognise when you ARE doing this, and search again before you post it. Write it again. Then offer it up. It's all about the person who posts it. Main thing, is keep on keeping on and don't be discouraged.
|
|
Rating: 4
| |
I wasn't asking for a gold star or gushing thanks. Just a thanks once in a while is good. You make other good points I take into consideration when I offer advice. They can follow the advice or not. The biggest issue was that I felt I was spending all this time and it wasn't reaching my target person.
|
|