Q: I am not sure if this is the right category. Wasn't sure what to put it in.
I need people who are sensitive and not judgmental because my situation is quite easy to judge but I actually really need some help. I'm really at a loss and don't know what to do. So if you are someone who would post rude comments, please leave now.
Okay so last year I was asked by a co worker to have a threesome with him and his wife... (I am a female). I couldn't help but say yes because I was curious and it was a fantasy of mine that I never actually thought would happen. Well even though I was on birth control I ended up getting pregnant from this.
Well this obviously caused a lot of issues in their marriage and I felt bad but I didn't know what to do so I left it up to them. They cut off contact with me up until I was about 7 months pregnant when he contacted me and wanted to try and work something out because he wanted to be involved in his babies life. It's been a very very complicated, messy and difficult situation as I am sure you can imagine. But his whole family, brothers, sisters in law, parents, grandparents are all involved and have come to see me and the baby and have just been wonderful. But he hasn't been able to see her yet because his wife is uncomfortable with everything even though she knew having a threesome could potentially cause this problem.
Well last week she decided she couldn't handle it and she left him. He has sacrificed a lot to be a part of his daughters life and I appreciate it but here is where the problem comes in...
Back when I had the threesome there was a guy living with me who practically raped me one night when I took an Ambien. I only have a very vague memory of it since I was drugged up. He admitted he did it to me but said he only entered for a minute and pulled out. I was pissed and kicked him out and haven't heard from him since and I cant even be sure when the date was. I thought for sure this happened a couple of weeks after I would have gotten pregnant but my baby looks so much like him. She is only a couple weeks old now but she has his nose almost totally and it really scares me. It's really hard to tell tho cuz she is so young but here is where I need advice...
The paternity test is in 2 weeks and I guess its a possibility that the threesome guy may not be the dad after all. After everything he has been through to be in her life and everything his family has done for us... I would be the single worst person alive if it turns out the guy who raped me is actually the father. It is very unlikely that it was him but at the same time... she really does look like him.
So my question is... how should I handle this if the paternity test comes out negative? What should I say to him and his family? How can I possibly apologize for something so extreme? Or should I tell him now that I was raped back then and risk losing his trust even if the test comes out positive? Overall... I just don't know what to do. Please help
