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I believe in stands on principle. I believe that doing right for the sake of doing right is a good way to live. I believe in self awareness and encourage it in others. I offer the most unbiased viewpoint I have. And yes, I am only human.
Im going to tell you what I think you need to hear. You are not supposed to take what I say and follow it. You are supposed to take what I say and _think_about_it_
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I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years. Initially when we got together he had a high porn addiction, but now we have been living together for a year and even longer than that, he's been watching it in reasonable amounts and for instance if I'm gone for the weekend.
I'm fine with that, but what concerns me is that his content choice is everything that I am not...
I.e he's always searching for threesomes, big boobs (I'm not even that small, I am a big C cup), hot redheads and anal.
From a guy's perspective, is this a reflection on everything I am not, or is it simply the small turn ons or even compensation; I have told him I'll never have a threesome as it never is as awesome as porn makes it seem & I don't think it is something for a serious couple.
I'm up for anal but he's never made the effort to commit to it - it takes both of us to make it happen & yes it requires more work than it does in porn but he's not even up for buying lube.
So please settle my mind by telling me what exactly guys see their porn choices as, desires? Simply just naked people fucking? (link)
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Porn watching generally falls into one of two categories.
a) Things you fantasize about doing
b) Things that turn you on to watch
Keep in mind that anything that falls into column a also falls into column b, but not all things in column b fall into column a.
Example, some people really enjoy watching certain sex acts but don't like doing them. I can think of at least one sexual position that is hot as hell to see on screen but in practice just doesn't feel as good as other things. It's about the actual visual imagery of the scene. I wouldn't want to have sex with someone else in that position, but I would love to watch a couple have sex in that position. It's pure voyeurism.
And as Rahzie said, fantasy does not always equal reality. Red heads have a stereotype about being crazy in bed. It's not really true, hair color has nothing to do with sexuality, but the fantasy is about all of the connotations in whoever's mind that that fantasy brings up.
His porn habits don't reflect a dissatisfaction with his sex life. But if you want to bring some new things into the bedroom, there's no reason not to. If you want to try something new go buy the lube yourself and figure it out.
Last, just for the record, the right threesome is better than porn could ever be. Serious couples have them all the time. You would be amazed how common it is for a married couple to invite a guy or girl or another couple into the bedroom. There are alot more people with bisexual tendencies than you'd think and group sex is often the only way to indulge when you're in a committed relationship.
And plenty of people just plain love group sex.
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Rating: 5
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I see your point & thank you for the input on threesomes/group sex... That still does not mean it is something I'm willing to do. Aside from that I am a very open person so It is not as if I am starving him from sexual fun. I asked him a few hours ago again the same question (he has never answered before) and compared it to seeing a whore on the streey. You know about their reputation, they might even be hot to look at but that's all it is.
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